Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About Pogox : Fuck all the dumbasses. I'm just here to verbally assault all the stupid, ignorant, uneducated, unintelligent, motherfuckers on earth.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I spent hours crafting a tiara to look like the princess from my boyfriend's favourite game series, Zelda. I sent him a picture of me wearing it, and got the reply: "Sure, that's nice, but you'd be better as Majora." FML
Today, my sister walked into my room, saying her boyfriend "forgot something." She then reached under my bed and pulled out a pair of boxers and a condom wrapper. Her response to my disgust was, "My bed was dirty." FML
Today, I witnessed my girlfriend and best "friend" getting intimate. In a dim-witted attempt to cover up, my best friend proclaimed, "This isn't what it looks like!" I might have given him the benefit of the doubt, had he not still been inside my girlfriend at the time. FML
Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML
Today, I surprisingly found two empty seats on the subway. Before anyone could get to them, I rushed and triumphantly sat down, enjoying my victory, until I noticed why they were empty. I had just sat down next to a guy vigorously trying to fellate himself. FML
Monday 1 September 2014