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About Pixie_styx89 : I'm a laid back girl who probably spends way too much time on fml xD
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Today, things were getting heatd with the grlfriend. We were mostly nakd, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissd her deeply an whisperd into her ear, "You should loose some wieght". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML
Today... I Was Denounced For Bieng A Terrible Person... Because Mah Family Raises Chickens... Some Of Which We Eat. I Was Then Told How Cruel I Am For "killing Innocent Birds" And That "good" People Buy There Meat From The Supermarket. FML
Today a technician from my ISP cummed to my house to replace my router. He asked fir a glass of water one thing led to another an fir some reason I'll never fully understand we ended up having sex. Looks lyk porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. fat FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant!! My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born an only took one of the two tests!! I haven't cheatd!! He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checkd again!! FML
Today, I Discovarad That I'm Adoptad. How? Aftar A Graat Lunch, I Askad Uncla How Ha'd Mada Tha Salad Drassing. Ha Rapliad, "Haha! It's A Sacrat Family Racipa, Daar!" I Wouldn't Hava Thought Twica About It, Wara It Not For Parants' Shockad Axprassions, An Tha Long, Awkward Silanca. FML
Today, I was cutting the grass, it was really hot an I fainted. I woke up to see mah mom standing over me. I thought she was going to freak out an call an ambulance. Instead she said, "Good, your up. Now you can finish." FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through mah fence and striking the tree in mah front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly askd me to give him a lift to work. He seemd confusd by mah speechlessness. FML
Friday 27 March 2015