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ParisMilton93

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ParisMilton93

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 797
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ParisMilton93 : My name's Leigh, from engkand

ParisMilton93's page activity

Visits<b>Arkajion</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 5:10pm<b>poncho55</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 5:49pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 4:45pm<b>ladystate</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Calaraphea</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:00pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:49am<b>Vball6</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:09pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 8:30pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 1:21pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 7:12am<b>matt1138</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 5:19pm<b>augiedd</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 12:03am<b>jaybee_23</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 10:47pm<b>_monicaamariee</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 1:07am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 11:27pm<b>efelsh</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 10:31pm<b>coolsunshinebear</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 11:36pm<b>myeviltwin</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 5:58pm

ParisMilton93's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of ParisMilton93's badges

ParisMilton93's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36145) - you deserved it (4523)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

#17601968
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29137) - you deserved it (6040)

On 08/28/2011 at 2:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset so I politely asked where is bathroom was so I could "powder my nose". After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML

#17134367
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36476) - you deserved it (4432)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:18am - misc - by anonymous - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck itself." FML

#16541898
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47000) - you deserved it (12001)

On 06/07/2011 at 2:51am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, the midwest blizzard hit my town, burying the roads in snow. All the local stores are closed. I'm not only currently on my period, but I'm out of pads and toilet paper. FML

#14827819
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44569) - you deserved it (9877)

On 02/03/2011 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17956) - you deserved it (43750) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

#14368305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27445) - you deserved it (9915)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my husband told me he had been cheating on me for the past 8 months. Twenty minutes later, he asked me what was for dinner. FML

#13102808
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37044) - you deserved it (2802)

On 09/18/2010 at 7:13pm - love - by fmldailyyy - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, I learned that I was conceived on a public bus. FML

#12573774
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41824) - you deserved it (4573)

On 08/17/2010 at 12:28am - intimacy - by ew. - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML

#12294723
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11840) - you deserved it (137209)

On 08/03/2010 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Emily (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25270) - you deserved it (49347)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22363) - you deserved it (3388)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

#7189298
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63428) - you deserved it (3160)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31019) - you deserved it (6956)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML

#6848786
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9313) - you deserved it (49264)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Klamp18 (man) - United States (New York)



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