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PHATERTL

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PHATERTL

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 629
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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PHATERTL's page activity

Visits<b>Ari1337</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 11:06pm<b>Stefanie88</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 1:15am<b>carry_on</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 5:41pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 9:20am

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50 favourites

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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PHATERTL's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

#17699087
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36386) - you deserved it (4444)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by waj9876 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

#17629318
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40982) - you deserved it (11517)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML

#17487537
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28521) - you deserved it (3408)

On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I treated my mom to a movie and lunch after she'd attended weeks of AA meetings. She snuck in a flask to the movie, and during lunch, she started calling people muggles. FML

#15128111
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (3098)

On 02/26/2011 at 4:53pm - misc - by BackToRehab - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was walking home, I passed some little girls who threw a bunch of snowballs at me. I dodged every single one, ran away laughing, and gave them the finger. I then ran into a snowman. FML

#14727355
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11775) - you deserved it (41351)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:19am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

#14090215
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22056) - you deserved it (10317)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my new coworker told me he expects me to call him King Kong and bow down to him whenever he walks past. FML

#12080410
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25553) - you deserved it (3158)

On 07/24/2010 at 3:44am - misc - by earths_venus - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML

#10974262
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31430) - you deserved it (23271)

On 06/04/2010 at 8:52pm - misc - by xricardo - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8494) - you deserved it (32839)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
183 comments

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

#6914931
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33305) - you deserved it (2769)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I had the weekend all to ourselves. On the second day, we finally got intimate, with me doing all she asked of her. In return for hard-work, she took my meat in her hand and started making lightsaber noises, before pronouncing "I don't see why people like it so much." FML

#5876001
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17268) - you deserved it (2916)

On 10/18/2009 at 7:29am - intimacy - by Ignitingmylightsaber (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

#5494730
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48218) - you deserved it (3724)

On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

#4674126
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18105) - you deserved it (44639)

On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57126) - you deserved it (4739)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)



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