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PHATERTL

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PHATERTL
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 428
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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PHATERTL's FML badges

50 favourites

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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PHATERTL's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML

#3561385
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45357) - you deserved it (6615)

On 07/07/2009 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a drunk guy hitting on a girl sitting alone at the bar. She insisted that her boyfriend was there, but he didn't relent. So I went over and put my arm around her and asked "Who's this guy?" He walked away, but then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her boyfriend. He broke my arm. FML

#3368467
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73727) - you deserved it (10879)

On 06/30/2009 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

#2754553
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75279) - you deserved it (5601)

On 06/09/2009 at 8:13pm - love - by SURPRISE (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I pulled up to a stoplight and blew past the car beside me to merge into one lane. About 30 seconds later, I ran out of gas right in front of them. We were on a bridge, and I had to push my car all the way across. FML

#2225045
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7946) - you deserved it (53329)

On 05/23/2009 at 10:17pm - misc - by DQB (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28759) - you deserved it (133751)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71240) - you deserved it (7972)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML

#1704585
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57047) - you deserved it (2326)

On 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm - misc - by Gumfanatic302 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34991) - you deserved it (87240)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

#620821
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (116272) - you deserved it (8557)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was enjoying my last day of Spring Break in Panama City. I got up to dance on the stage at the Holiday Inn in front of hundreds of college kids. I tried to be sexy by turning around and bending over. My friends took pictures and my bloody tampon string was hanging out the whole time. FML

#470055
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31353) - you deserved it (87386)

On 03/19/2009 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by LindseyS (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22126) - you deserved it (36027)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

#689
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17091) - you deserved it (6516)

On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version



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