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PHATERTL

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PHATERTL

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 870
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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PHATERTL's page activity

Visits<b>aliceanon</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:11am<b>Ari1337</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 11:06pm<b>Stefanie88</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 1:15am<b>carry_on</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 5:41pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 9:20am

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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PHATERTL's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40193) - you deserved it (6571)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

#21207892
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41555) - you deserved it (6141)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I confided to my boyfriend that I have a condition that causes me to grow thick toe hair. He now won't stop calling me "the sexy Hobbit." FML

#21206358
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40403) - you deserved it (6414)

On 07/11/2014 at 8:26pm - health - by sexyhobbit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on the internet playing a game. I have a speech impediment, and the guy running it told me to get off his server for making fun of disabled people. FML

#21199175
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45702) - you deserved it (3781)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:37am - misc - by Wow (man) - United States (California)

Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML

#21191852
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52032) - you deserved it (4729)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:26pm - work - by justno - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my wife muttering "God, I want you so bad". Figuring she was either talking to me or longing for the second cumming of Christ, I turned over to see which. Turned out she was rubbing one out to some guy's Facebook photos on her phone. FML

#21157398
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60629) - you deserved it (6693)

On 05/30/2014 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by lahiros (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my mom showing her friends that she can deepthroat a banana. That's something I could've lived a long and happy life without seeing. FML

#21141912
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52029) - you deserved it (5036)

On 05/16/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by fuck florida (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41100) - you deserved it (15332)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

#21138864
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51719) - you deserved it (7005)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by taintedlover (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63709) - you deserved it (8101)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50049) - you deserved it (18164)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex and in the heat of the moment I cried out for him to go harder. He had an exasperated expression on his face, and in an adamantly offended tone he said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he stopped and left the room. FML

#21115855
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56228) - you deserved it (7847)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by belljars (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while I was waiting for the bus, I was whistling. I saw a cute girl running and I looked at my phone so it didn't seem too awkward. I was still whistling as she passed by so it sounded like I whistled at her. She ran back to slap me. FML

#21113376
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38607) - you deserved it (6675)

On 04/15/2014 at 12:24am - misc - by heycutie - United States (Michigan)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65181) - you deserved it (32619)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)



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