Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Otherkin

Offline (yesterday at 4:30pm) | Search for a member

Otherkin

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4872
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Otherkin's page activity

Visits<b>Riya2595</b> - the 05/28/2012 at 7:00am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:22pm<b>acccccccc</b> - the 05/13/2010 at 7:34pm<b>Miss_lunatic</b> - the 04/21/2010 at 9:33am

Otherkin's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Otherkin's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

#19281445
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32198) - you deserved it (2021)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by Bebefer - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML

#19270252
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30124) - you deserved it (7445)

On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML

#19237178
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11639) - you deserved it (19313)

On 03/08/2012 at 12:47am - work - by Honey Badger (woman) - United States

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

#19231418
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11666) - you deserved it (40273)

On 03/07/2012 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dog managed to pull a one-pound package of raw bacon out and eat the entire package including the cardboard. The vets cheered when they finally got him to puke up the entire, unchewed package of bacon. FML

Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML

#19164002
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28262) - you deserved it (5116)

On 02/25/2012 at 10:13pm - misc - by baconandkittens (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

#19137014
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8412) - you deserved it (19000)

On 02/22/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by jenni6488 - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

#19130391
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26478) - you deserved it (8286)

On 02/21/2012 at 10:33am - health - by mary (woman) - Australia

Today, I was speaking to an old friend and I asked her how her mother was. She replied, "She passed away, you came to her funeral last month." FML

#19121013
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8569) - you deserved it (40970)

On 02/20/2012 at 5:01am - misc - by elizabethyeo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

#19101207
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36121) - you deserved it (5581)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States

Today, I met my brother for the first time in 20 years. Everything was going great, until he tried to make out with me. FML

#19094213
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43375) - you deserved it (2838)

On 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked into two things. The first was a spiderweb. The second, due to blind panic, was oncoming traffic. FML

#19072252
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21864) - you deserved it (4971)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27432) - you deserved it (8696) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

#19033928
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36733) - you deserved it (1901)

On 02/09/2012 at 12:28pm - health - by Ouchies - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

#19030539
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20691) - you deserved it (9311)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: