About OnlyAvailableID : Seeing as you're here, I made a no-no didn't I? It was probably a terrible pun, I always do them. I'm just so unoriginal, unfunny and absolutely twattish.
Ilyz n' shit.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28666) - you deserved it (18159)
On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I came home from school and found my mother singing along to her latest investment, a compilation CD filled with heavy metal covers of ABBA classics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13904) - you deserved it (2229)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:11am - misc - by kansah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24200) - you deserved it (4391)
On 10/04/2011 at 4:57am - misc - by storksleuth (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25332) - you deserved it (10752)
On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34928) - you deserved it (2063)
On 09/21/2011 at 3:01am - animals - by socks - United States
Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47872) - you deserved it (4812)
On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28073) - you deserved it (11931)
On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23335) - you deserved it (6429)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital, my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home, a 2 hour drive, listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never find a better man. Then the morphine wore off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33419) - you deserved it (1638)
On 09/17/2011 at 3:44am - love - by anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, after a conference with my teacher who had previously accused me of not doing my homework, she finally discovered she'd been losing it all this time. I've been getting straight Fs for a month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23611) - you deserved it (1392)
On 09/06/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by purpleivy (woman) - United States
Today, thanks to my wife's confession, I found out that the 14 year old child I've raised since I was 16 isn't related to me at all. But at least this narrows the real father down to one of three other guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33409) - you deserved it (2738)
On 08/26/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by candie - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25342) - you deserved it (4080)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend wrote me a break-up letter, using Comic Sans. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25996) - you deserved it (2895)
On 08/25/2011 at 10:33am - love - by hendrix1 - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend wrote me a break-up letter, using Comic Sans. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25996) - you deserved it (2895)
On 08/25/2011 at 10:33am - love - by hendrix1 - United States (California)
Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21948) - you deserved it (4561)
On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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