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OnlyAvailableID

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OnlyAvailableID

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OnlyAvailableIDOnlyAvailableID
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5987
  • Number of comments : 139
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About OnlyAvailableID : Eudaemonia.

OnlyAvailableID's page activity

Visits<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 6:18am<b>shadowedpixie</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 3:31am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 11:51am<b>Lalala579121</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 12:50pm<b>Zarniclopsindorf</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 12:43pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 9:32pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 9:10pm<b>captainsmegma</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:59pm<b>cnbcad</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:12am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 7:59am<b>thelastavailable</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 4:59am<b>your_ma</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 3:30am<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 9:47pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 3:08am<b>kerstileann</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 11:17pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:54pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 10:44pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 6:14am

Liked!<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 1:59pm

OnlyAvailableID's FML badges

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You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of OnlyAvailableID's badges

OnlyAvailableID's favorite FMLs

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65354) - you deserved it (32723)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was given a call home, a 3-day-suspension, and a week of detention in school for a "serious violation of the code of conduct." Said violation? Jogging in the middle of the hall. FML

#21107042
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38729) - you deserved it (4290)

On 04/07/2014 at 7:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43603) - you deserved it (6516)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML

#21090158
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42055) - you deserved it (3718)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

#21088206
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42263) - you deserved it (3766)

On 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

#21082455
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41240) - you deserved it (7769)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my boss for a few days off next week, because my grandmother passed away yesterday and I'll need to travel to attend the funeral. His response: "She's dead, you're not. You want time off, then quit." FML

#21080680
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56120) - you deserved it (3490)

On 03/07/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by GLHan (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

#21078597
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65215) - you deserved it (5126)

On 03/05/2014 at 7:33am - health - by rolypoly (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40406) - you deserved it (9347)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was doing a science presentation about glucose. There was around 20 judges at the event who could've judged me, but instead I got judged by the only person in the whole entire world who doesn't know what glucose is and doesn't think it exists. FML

#21066140
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42101) - you deserved it (3028)

On 02/20/2014 at 12:27am - work - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a customer at work pronounced the word "Asian" as "Ah-See-Awn" when ordering a salad. I wasn't allowed to say anything. FML

#21065187
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34634) - you deserved it (3850)

On 02/19/2014 at 1:24am - work - by PaneraSucks - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a woman pushed a stroller in front of my car. Thinking I'd hit someone, I jumped out. Turns out it was a doll. The "woman" was a 14-year-old girl, claiming, "I did it for the Vine!" FML

#21058421
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50076) - you deserved it (3947)

On 02/12/2014 at 7:52pm - misc - by Parusu - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62025) - you deserved it (26980)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

#21012409
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47929) - you deserved it (11247)

On 01/01/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by Lonesome (man) - United States (Louisiana)



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  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

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