About Omnomnomnivore : Nothing interesting to say, really. I'm using the app most of the time, but I use the website to. Messages are welcome :)
And yes, the raccoon in the pic is real. She was taken by animal control, killed, and tested on because she was a "dangerous wild animal" .. this was my favorite picture of her. She was sleeping on top of my dad's pitbull. Doesn't she look dangerous?
R.I.P. Meeko 2008-2012
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20685) - you deserved it (2961)
On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia
Today, I found out that the only thing worse than a psycho, overbearing, controlling girlfriend is a psycho, overbearing and controlling ex-girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24457) - you deserved it (2714)
On 02/06/2012 at 12:50am - love - by bluesox4 (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21618) - you deserved it (7042)
On 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm - health - by indierocklove - United States (Virginia)
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33489) - you deserved it (2404)
On 01/24/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while I was in confession, I was saying my sins and the priest called me a "pain in the ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28902) - you deserved it (7245)
On 11/29/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by ? - United States
Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6220) - you deserved it (28095)
On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10591) - you deserved it (40414)
On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)
Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10591) - you deserved it (40414)
On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)
Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10591) - you deserved it (40414)
On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)
Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61659) - you deserved it (6442)
On 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by Baggabbles123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
