Omnomnomnivore

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Omnomnomnivore

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 220
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Omnomnomnivore : Nothing interesting to say, really. I'm using the app most of the time, but I use the website to. Messages are welcome :)
And yes, the raccoon in the pic is real. She was taken by animal control, killed, and tested on because she was a "dangerous wild animal" .. this was my favorite picture of her. She was sleeping on top of my dad's pitbull. Doesn't she look dangerous?
R.I.P. Meeko 2008-2012

Omnomnomnivore's page activity

Visits<b>wobbly1</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:12pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:47am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 05/08/2012 at 12:22pm

Omnomnomnivore's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

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Omnomnomnivore's favorite FMLs

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

by LNamesOnly / 07/09/2012 at 3:31am / Australia / Kids

Today, I found out that the only thing worse than a psycho, overbearing, controlling girlfriend is a psycho, overbearing and controlling ex-girlfriend. FML

by bluesox4 / 02/06/2012 at 12:50am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML

by indierocklove / 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2010 at 9:25am / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, while I was in confession, I was saying my sins and the priest called me a "pain in the ass." FML

by ? / 11/29/2009 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

by tryscal / 07/12/2009 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

by tryscal / 07/12/2009 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

by tryscal / 07/12/2009 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was camping. Me and this really cute girl were hitting it off real nice. It was the last night so we both headed over to my tent to have sex. I was just about to get it in when a raccoon ripped my tent causing the girl to scream and runaway. I got cockblocked by a raccoon. FML

by Baggabbles123 / 06/08/2009 at 7:24pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy