Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ohmie

Search for a member

Ohmie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2800
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Ohmie's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:56am

Ohmie's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Ohmie's badges

Ohmie's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally forgot my glasses in a store bathroom. When I finally noticed, I went back to find that someone was wearing them as he was walking out of the store. I didn't have the balls to call him out on it. FML

#15244433
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10561) - you deserved it (42741)

On 03/08/2011 at 9:23pm - misc - by Trippy Penguin -

Today, I had to sell my phone to pay for the phone bill. FML

#15087655
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19652) - you deserved it (24534)

On 02/23/2011 at 4:18am - money - by suzyyy (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I printed out a picture of the popular girl in school as a sort of 'model' for how I wanted my hair cut. The hairdresser taped the picture to the mirror so he could see. Halfway through, my 'model' came in for an appointment. FML

#14993879
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29214) - you deserved it (20034)

On 02/15/2011 at 8:34pm - misc - by nerdychick (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML

#14943630
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55333) - you deserved it (4263)

On 02/12/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

#14753442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34434) - you deserved it (4292)

On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)

Today, my 4 year old cousin is staying overnight. Every time I fall asleep he wakes me up to tell me I fell asleep. FML

#14716778
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33117) - you deserved it (3395)

On 01/26/2011 at 2:48am - kids - by Braelynn -

Today, I called my boss and said "I have been awake since 3am throwing up." He replied with "Great, see you at 9" and hung up. FML

#14638505
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29671) - you deserved it (2943)

On 01/19/2011 at 12:31pm - work - by gb739 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

#14632650
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22269) - you deserved it (2874)

On 01/18/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by desertpunk75 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took the time to make myself look nice just so that the pizza guy would think I had a life. FML

#14628920
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26619) - you deserved it (7749)

On 01/18/2011 at 6:07pm - misc - by sunshine19217 - United States (Florida)

Today, my friends were acting strange around me. This afternoon, I got a text asking me to meet them out for a couple of drinks. Because of all the strange acting, I decided to tell them I'd go and then not go. I just found out they had been planning me a surprise party. FML

#14627617
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7590) - you deserved it (45858)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:53pm - misc - by slondons (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59299) - you deserved it (6125) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40877) - you deserved it (26882) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of his morning dump because it was heart-shaped. FML

#14608701
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32859) - you deserved it (5726) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, after staying up all night at my friend's house, I woke up to something I couldn't identify on my cheek, so I slapped it away. When I heard crying, I opened my eyes and realized it was my friend's three year old sister who was trying to be sweet by kissing me on the cheek. FML

#14577933
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31348) - you deserved it (14659)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by ash (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML

#14534141
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39463) - you deserved it (4174)

On 01/10/2011 at 3:35pm - health - by triplenipple (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: