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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15676) - you deserved it (7018)
On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands
Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26023) - you deserved it (1994) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40433) - you deserved it (6020)
On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31103) - you deserved it (4550)
On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I introduced my boyfriend of two weeks to my parents. My dad asked me to leave the room so they could have some "guy talk". I eavesdropped, only to hear the words "sex-crazed f*ck" and a threat to stick bamboo shoots under my boyfriend's fingernails if he ever hurt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (3204)
On 01/15/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by soontobedumped (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20305) - you deserved it (2454) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26185) - you deserved it (2536)
On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20994) - you deserved it (5157)
On 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Arab Emirates
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26877) - you deserved it (6970)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21653) - you deserved it (2930)
On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21653) - you deserved it (2930)
On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14332) - you deserved it (18828) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23459) - you deserved it (4491)
On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34600) - you deserved it (6305)
On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27858) - you deserved it (4237)
On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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