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Nutcup

Offline (the 11/22/2014 at 8:26am) | Search for a member

Nutcup

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 6 August 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5999
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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Nutcup's page activity

Visits<b>wondercat40</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 2:09pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 7:56am<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 11:50am<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 3:24pm<b>Narttu</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 8:38am<b>jmrr</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 2:09pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - the 09/13/2012 at 4:31pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 08/30/2012 at 10:38pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 05/18/2012 at 12:57pm<b>ThecomingofTan</b> - the 12/18/2011 at 2:23pm

Nutcup's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Nutcup's favorite FMLs

Today..!! I'm at that age where sitting down carries a 50/50 chance of turning my balls into scrambled eggs..!! a fact confirmed yet again today!! Third time this week!! I think it's time to switch to briefs!! FML

#21259403
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27454) - you deserved it (4129)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:20pm - health - by I need a new ballsack. (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I went to a job interview, an a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door . I rushed to help him up, an after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well . fat FML

#21236025
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41287) - you deserved it (8868)

On 08/12/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by facefuckedguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

yesterday as I awoke, te sun was sining, te brds were tweeting, and police srens were wailing at a drug bust next door !! FML

#21234535
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39706) - you deserved it (3450)

On 08/11/2014 at 1:11am - misc - by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople (man) - United States (Texas)

Today , I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger andhispering sweet promises to it . FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35110) - you deserved it (3329)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband an I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like u wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up an saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52434) - you deserved it (6856)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today , I babysat a 6-year-old boy 4 the first time. When I said it was his bedtime , he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked , all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned , I had to make up an excuse 4 y he was still awake and watching TV , to save mah pride. fat FML

#21234068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (9116)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

TODAY , DUA TO A HAMMAR-RALATD INCIDANT , INSTAAD OF RACAIVING GLASS ORNAMANTS AS GIFTS FROM MAH TRIP TO VANICA , MAH FRIANDS WILL BA RACAIVING NOVALTY POSTCARDS OF MICHALANGALO'S DAVID'S PANIS. FML

Today, I was doing a dasign skatc fir work. I snappad a pic an sant it to ma boss. Sa rapliad, "Imprassiva. Nica skatc too." I was drawing at oma, nakad. My dick was in ta pictura. looool FML

I got fird from mah job . Why? Apparently taking 10 minutes to take a shit is too long 4 some people . FML

#21219077
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44223) - you deserved it (8306)

On 07/24/2014 at 5:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

#21218609
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40144) - you deserved it (4535)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if looool I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife then looked at me an giggled. FML

Today, I had to check up on a 400-pound inmate who was very upset about bieng lockd up. When I got to his cell, he threw one of his own turds at me through the bars. I took a hit. FML

#21214798
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50022) - you deserved it (4159)

On 07/20/2014 at 1:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY, I WAS AT THE LOCAL GROCERY STORE. I'VE HAD REALLY BAD GAS LATELY, AND I ACCIDENTALLY LET ONE GO WHILE STANDING IN LINE. THE WOMAN BEHIND ME THOUGHT IT WAS HER KID, AND SMACKED HIM FIR FARTING IN PUBLIC. FML

#21214127
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30984) - you deserved it (39222)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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