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Noxic

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Noxic
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9961
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 60 posted

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Noxic's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

#482680
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10855) - you deserved it (73071)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by lukey_G (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was working at Coldstone. When a customer tips us we are required to sing. A late night DJ came in, put 20 dollars in the tip cup, and asked to hear every song we had. After we sang one song he looked at me and asked me to please stop singing or he was taking his money back. FML

#432216
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54338) - you deserved it (8060)

On 03/18/2009 at 1:05am - work - by Rev (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied "oh I usually come early." She laughed. FML

#379796
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50144) - you deserved it (30718)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:40pm - misc - by SmoothTalker (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I spent a solid four hours and over one hundred dollars preparing a nice fancy meal for my new girlfriend. A delicious three pound rack of ribs with a sweet and sour marinade. Steam broccoli with melted cheese. Home made buttermilk biscuits. I serve the meal. She doesn't eat beef. FML

#374506
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26022) - you deserved it (60758)

On 03/16/2009 at 5:55am - misc - by WhatdyaDo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to this hot girl I have dinner with every week. Lately she’s always telling me how she loves me and I do the same. Today she said: "The way we talk and act around each other, people would think we were dating." My answer was: "Aren't we?". FML

#369529
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73788) - you deserved it (13086)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I got a letter saying I was no longer a student at my college and my current work is void since I had ignored and refused to pay my tuition bill. Over the past month I've been deleting these pesky emails saying 'FINAL WARNING regarding payment' thinking it was more spam. They weren't. FML

#312852
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23269) - you deserved it (104998)

On 03/13/2009 at 10:57pm - money - by goddamnit (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my friends and I were drinking boba. On the side of the cup it said "Please drink carefully to avoid choking on the Boba". I started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the label, and choked on the boba in a coughing fit. FML

#296354
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12221) - you deserved it (61328)

On 03/13/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

#284763
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58457) - you deserved it (19381)

On 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by mugs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML

#283028
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (240713) - you deserved it (36566)

On 03/12/2009 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by sucks - United States

Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML

#242337
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56076) - you deserved it (15813)

On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States

Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML

#240683
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41671) - you deserved it (8828)

On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I bragged to a coworker that our boss compliments me constantly on my work performance, my fashion sense, and my trustworthiness. She then directed me to a "neighborhood watch" website. My boss is a registered sex offender. FML

#239569
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46276) - you deserved it (6585)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:47am - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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