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Noxic

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Noxic

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11661
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 60 posted

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Noxic's page activity

Visits<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/21/2009 at 11:30pm<b>Jerhel</b> - the 11/13/2009 at 7:24pm<b>Darkodar</b> - the 11/11/2009 at 5:11pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 09/08/2009 at 2:50pm<b>prplr</b> - the 09/05/2009 at 6:10pm

Noxic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Noxic's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter's school called to inform me that I needed to bring her some sneakers. Not feeling like driving the 15 minutes to her school, I told them I was away from town. Then I realized I was on my house phone. FML

#6692525
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4996) - you deserved it (62840)

On 12/10/2009 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, during a review session for a botany class, I began to space out. Then, I started to go, "beep, beep, beep, beep." I stopped when I noticed the entire class staring at me as if I were insane. This was not the first time this had happened. FML

#6691073
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8003) - you deserved it (31501)

On 12/10/2009 at 4:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round ones, and a skinny one, making it look like a penis. I laughed. I'm 33. FML

#6686658
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7621) - you deserved it (27929)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by HarryBeast (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was attending a drug-free lecture at school. The speaker said, "There are many ways to quit smoking. You can try patches, gum, or even quitting cold turkey. Any questions?" I raised my hand, and she called on me. I asked, "How does cold turkey help?" And then I realized. FML

#6683898
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7799) - you deserved it (34495)

On 12/09/2009 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they put in, it said, "Battery was put in backwards. No other problems found." FML

#6680274
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5358) - you deserved it (40586)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by her0x3her0ine617 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend was telling me how concerned she was about her weight. I told her not to worry, because it gives more cushion for the pushin' anyway. She picked up a lamp and threw it right at my dingleberries. FML

#6679644
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7826) - you deserved it (67962)

On 12/09/2009 at 12:09pm - love - by ouch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I met a girl who's the whole package: brains, beauty, shared interests, great personality, single, and into me. Too bad I married my bitchy, depressive high school girlfriend who said she'd kill herself if I didn't. Sometimes, she still tells me she'll do it if we divorce. I believe her. FML

#6677904
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43539) - you deserved it (20855)

On 12/09/2009 at 8:27am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my greatgrandpa came over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, he pooped himself. My family went through the rest of the meal acting like we hadn't noticed to avoid embarassment. As it was coming to an end, my sister came home and immediately yelled, "Ew! Did someone poop?" He cried. FML

#6676147
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42357) - you deserved it (2612)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by PoorGramps - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend finally invited me over to his parents house so I could meet them. My boyfriend, his dad and I were sitting in the living room, when I saw a really sketchy person outside, so I said, "There is some creepy hobo man outside, messing with your trash." The "creepy hobo" was his mom. FML

#6658638
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9401) - you deserved it (35499)

On 12/08/2009 at 12:09am - love - by CheLi (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized I've lived alone too long. I read 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' to my cat. I used expression in my voice, and I made sure he could see the pictures. My son called, and I told him about it. He gave me the number for the local psychiatric ward. FML

#6625843
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24028) - you deserved it (8664)

On 12/05/2009 at 11:30pm - animals - by JC (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML

#6612608
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19626) - you deserved it (2582)

On 12/05/2009 at 4:07am - intimacy - by lastalittlelonger (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML

#6608304
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6636) - you deserved it (29542)

On 12/04/2009 at 11:08pm - misc - by Wino (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML

#6598965
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11883) - you deserved it (30878)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:23pm - animals - by oops (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, the electrician came because our kitchen light has been flickering. After examining the installation, he screws the lightbulb tighter in the socket. My parents both are PhDs. FML

#6596231
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24527) - you deserved it (7186)

On 12/04/2009 at 5:16am - kids - by PhDdaughter (woman) - Switzerland (Fribourg)

Today, I started growing hair on my upper lip. I'm finally becoming a man! Too bad I'm a 17 year old girl. FML

#6594462
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36902) - you deserved it (4617)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:55am - health - by harry (woman) - Hong Kong



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