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Nothingness1

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Nothingness1
  • Town/Country : Calgary, Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 938
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Nothingness1 : Lalala. Just ask. =]

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Nothingness1's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

#4572721
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55086) - you deserved it (9618)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

#4555175
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42502) - you deserved it (20524)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

#4531515
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32577) - you deserved it (13777)

On 08/14/2009 at 6:28pm - money - by scfead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my grandma went to get birthday gifts for my twin sister and me. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute? 'cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML

#4530948
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42340) - you deserved it (3357)

On 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by twingirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML

#4527001
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42949) - you deserved it (9410)

On 08/14/2009 at 2:33pm - intimacy - by vicgal - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML

#4525349
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34414) - you deserved it (5420)

On 08/14/2009 at 1:01pm - work - by dumblond (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

#4503474
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8797) - you deserved it (118137)

On 08/13/2009 at 3:47pm - health - by Nick (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I was speeding down a long hill and my jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, and then the rest of my pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

#4486771
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33306) - you deserved it (5170)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:01pm - misc - by OMGWTF (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was volunteering at the library. A kid came up and asked me to help him peel the back off his sticker. It took me so long the kid left. Determined, I still tried to peel it off. Fifteen minutes later, the librarian came over, looked once at it, and told me it wasn't a sticker. FML

#4484450
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8993) - you deserved it (35201)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:34pm - work - by librarygirl (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML

#4468177
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15727) - you deserved it (38669)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:49am - misc - by Bambi (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

#4440172
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44687) - you deserved it (6832)

On 08/11/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

#4440172
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44687) - you deserved it (6832)

On 08/11/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

#4432884
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21007) - you deserved it (61006)

On 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Morrowindwhore (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I bought a new computer. I gave my old one to my mother. After handing it over and going home, I realised I forgot to change the background picture, a naked photo of my girlfriend. FML

#4426639
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7089) - you deserved it (57643)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by picaboo (man) - Singapore

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

#4425556
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11151) - you deserved it (48638)

On 08/10/2009 at 10:34am - misc - by klutz (woman) - United States (Texas)



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