Nothingness1

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Offline (the 10/31/2015 at 6:05am)

Nothingness1

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1688
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Nothingness1 : Lalala. Just ask. =]

Nothingness1's page activity

Visits<b>darksinner222</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 7:43pm<b>Stranger32</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 1:39am<b>Tricuspid</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 11:15am<b>tchopper1969</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 6:19am<b>Pyneapple</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 5:06am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 8:24pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 1:34pm<b>Ditagein</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 10:51am<b>Narttu</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 2:01pm<b>ILoveHashtags</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 1:50am<b>TayeT</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:28pm<b>thermos159</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 11:23am<b>Big_Pickle</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:46pm<b>Karamelo</b> - the 05/18/2011 at 7:06pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:46am<b>prplr</b> - the 08/17/2009 at 5:41pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/17/2009 at 4:43pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/15/2009 at 1:11pm

Nothingness1's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Nothingness1's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2009 at 1:14pm / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

by notguilty / 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking home when a man passed me and stopped. Thinking he was staring at my butt, I asked him kindly to stop. He then laughed and grabbed my wallet that was in my back pocket, and ran. He wasn't staring at my butt, and found it funny that I thought he was. FML

by scfead / 08/14/2009 at 6:28pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Money

Today, my grandma went to get birthday gifts for my twin sister and me. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute? 'cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML

by twingirl / 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, while having sex I realized two things. First, I can't remember the last time my boyfriend gave me an orgasm, and secondly I think the curtains slightly clash with the duvet cover. I was more annoyed with the second one. FML

by vicgal / 08/14/2009 at 2:33pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML

by dumblond / 08/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Maine) / Work

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

by Nick / 08/13/2009 at 3:47pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I was speeding down a long hill and my jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, and then the rest of my pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

by OMGWTF / 08/12/2009 at 10:01pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was volunteering at the library. A kid came up and asked me to help him peel the back off his sticker. It took me so long the kid left. Determined, I still tried to peel it off. Fifteen minutes later, the librarian came over, looked once at it, and told me it wasn't a sticker. FML

by librarygirl / 08/12/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML

by Bambi / 08/12/2009 at 2:49am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

by Morrowindwhore / 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Intimacy

Today, I bought a new computer. I gave my old one to my mother. After handing it over and going home, I realised I forgot to change the background picture, a naked photo of my girlfriend. FML

by picaboo / 08/10/2009 at 12:41pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

by klutz / 08/10/2009 at 10:34am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous