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Not_Ever_Telling

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Not_Ever_Telling

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 May 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9739
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Not_Ever_Telling's page activity

Visits<b>xoxo_eatshit</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 2:38pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:00pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 03/01/2011 at 2:03pm<b>lionqueen1400</b> - the 02/14/2011 at 10:53pm<b>RLJJ</b> - the 06/30/2009 at 5:53pm<b>laplaj19</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 1:23am

Not_Ever_Telling's FML badges

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Not_Ever_Telling's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML

#14329658
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7524) - you deserved it (36929)

On 12/25/2010 at 12:29am - love - by desigymrat - France

Today, I was running late and rushing to a waiting bus. I made it to the doors just as they closed. I knocked desperately, hoping the driver would let me in. He hovered his hand over the button for a few seconds, then flipped me off and drove away laughing. FML

#14325917
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29886) - you deserved it (3338)

On 12/24/2010 at 5:32pm - misc - by hahahano (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met up with an old high school friend who I used to make fun of because he put so much effort into his studies. Turns out he makes my annual salary in a month. FML

#14322197
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7432) - you deserved it (86708)

On 12/24/2010 at 10:12am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got fired from my job. My manager found Facebook pictures of me drinking underage at a party. He said he didn't want "that kind of image" associated with the business. It was his birthday party. He supplied the booze. FML

#14307900
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28669) - you deserved it (17489)

On 12/23/2010 at 5:04am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally walked in on my roommate while she was changing clothes. She insisted on telling her boyfriend what had happened, because, "It wouldn't feel right" if she didn't. Her boyfriend is a MMA fighter/bodybuilder and has major jealousy issues. I'm screwed. FML

#14297992
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38979) - you deserved it (3728)

On 12/22/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by screwed (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 14 year-old son sent a broadcast on my blackberry saying ''I'm a young gay man looking for some fun!'' to all my contacts as a joke. What he didn't know was that it's my work phone. FML

#14284329
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34660) - you deserved it (4950)

On 12/21/2010 at 11:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while registering at the grocery store, a customer came into my lane with a 100 piece boiled shrimp platter. Feeling hungry, I muttered "nom nom" under my breath. The old man called my supervisor. Apparently I called him a moron. FML

#14266887
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13052) - you deserved it (25474)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:02am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29619) - you deserved it (3425)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, another man proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes. FML

#14246751
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51093) - you deserved it (4373)

On 12/18/2010 at 11:13am - love - by timor (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

#14205128
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23577) - you deserved it (20490)

On 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, at the office, everyone in my department swapped secret santa presents. I bought the guy whose name I picked a DVD box-set of his favorite TV series. One of my friends got a fancy make up kit. Another got a pack of posh notebooks. I got a toilet plunger. FML

#14202172
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27118) - you deserved it (2837)

On 12/14/2010 at 1:02pm - misc - by hozzyandie (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML

#14120118
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12296) - you deserved it (81440)

On 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

#14119130
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32060) - you deserved it (2742)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

#14106944
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13776) - you deserved it (22886)

On 12/06/2010 at 12:03pm - misc - by bribreeeeeezyfreshhh (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML

#14090266
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5529) - you deserved it (59065)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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