NoctisLiberi

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NoctisLiberi

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3928
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About NoctisLiberi : College student. Bilingual. Random.

Love Reddit's /r/NoSleep

~ engaged ~

NoctisLiberi's page activity

Visits<b>iOceanus</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 4:46am<b>dieselwrench4</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 2:21am<b>tmx90</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 10:38pm<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 8:19pm<b>hayhay2301</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 7:42pm<b>CoolBreezeKing</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 7:18pm<b>washingtonb</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 7:02pm<b>DudeEvil</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 6:26pm<b>kimj356</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 1:20pm<b>Bengals8807</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 1:01pm<b>bushyyboy</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 11:46am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 12:04am<b>pistolpete85</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 6:14pm<b>qvhkrmcl</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 2:48pm<b>JefftheRipper</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 9:42pm

NoctisLiberi's FML badges

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Judgmental

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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NoctisLiberi's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML

by disgusted / 09/24/2012 at 3:16pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy

Today, I realized how lonely I am when I got excited over receiving my daily weather update from the Weather Channel. FML

by mstar / 09/24/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my five-year-old told me she had accidentally swallowed a thumbtack. In panic mode we raced to the ER. With no insurance. Only after the tests, examinations and X-rays did she tell me was "just joking." FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2012 at 12:51am / United States / Kids

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to "see what the fuss was about." I would have been angry if the sight of him dressed like this hadn't turned me on more than he ever has in the 3 years we've been dating. FML

by ClaireBear150 / 09/19/2012 at 11:09pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, thinking I was alone in my house, I went downstairs in my underwear, singing at the top of my voice. I strutted into the kitchen to find two middle-aged men I'd never seen before sat at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Turns out they will be painting our house for the next two weeks. FML

by Anonymous / 09/18/2012 at 10:48am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

by not the scalpel / 09/15/2012 at 3:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML

by shadokis / 09/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML

by Iguana / 09/11/2012 at 10:35pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2012 at 3:02am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2012 at 10:20am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, the iPhone app I downloaded that plays cricket noises during the night, has attracted a horde of actual crickets into my bedroom. FML

by Gurl / 09/07/2012 at 6:32pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML

by steve / 09/05/2012 at 4:14am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

by thewhompingwillow / 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

by Geckosrock99 / 08/30/2012 at 10:45pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.