Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ninjin1986

Offline (the 12/18/2014 at 11:41am) | Search for a member

Ninjin1986

1Liked!

Ninjin1986
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3450
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Ninjin1986 : Uhhh kind of shy, but always looking for people to talk to :P
I like sports, music, computers, going out.. the usual stuff.
Don't hesitate to message me ;)

Ninjin1986's page activity

Visits<b>mmahone9</b> - 18 hours ago<b>CTPope74</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:04pm<b>RenoTheRhino</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 10:29am<b>MrConcise</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 2:31am<b>Toolishing</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:07am<b>AUSSTHEBOSS246</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 11:31pm<b>ChawanKiti</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 12:26am<b>AUSSTHEBOSS</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 4:12pm<b>HereNReady</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:39am<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 8:58am<b>mister_icicle</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 8:35am<b>okcnation</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:05am<b>sazaraa</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 4:52am<b>brutally</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:58am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:49am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:22pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 4:30am<b>olpally</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 6:00pm

Liked!<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 11:53pm

Ninjin1986's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Ninjin1986's badges

Ninjin1986's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML

#11198427
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18835) - you deserved it (25073)

On 06/14/2010 at 7:13pm - kids - by gibsonSG323 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML

#11105800
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45117) - you deserved it (4058)

On 06/10/2010 at 3:59pm - misc - by Collin - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

#10813076
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7888) - you deserved it (37675)

On 05/28/2010 at 12:30am - animals - by Teresa (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when her cat attacked me. I was pissed, so I grabbed the cat and rushed outside to get rid of it. Little did I know, her parents were home, sitting outside. So I was naked, with a feral cat in front of my junk trying to kill me. All I could say was "Nice Weather?" FML

#10761245
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19516) - you deserved it (34627)

On 05/25/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17520) - you deserved it (25898)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was home alone. It was very dark and so I went to turn on the lights, when I heard the sound of a gun loading. I dropped to the floor but never heard a gun fire. I got up and heard the sound again. When I got lights on, I discovered it was only my printer telling me it was out of paper. FML

#8882513
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8855) - you deserved it (21782)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by OhaiiKid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

#8294637
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35708) - you deserved it (7287)

On 02/15/2010 at 10:21am - love - by Ashlee - United States

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

#7744599
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7650) - you deserved it (30332)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

#7637016
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8420) - you deserved it (38243)

On 01/28/2010 at 5:24am - misc - by wishihadpockets (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that my anxiety disorder has escalated to where I now scratch and pick at my face while asleep. Now I get to sleep with oven mitts taped to my hands. FML

#7354954
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27688) - you deserved it (2634)

On 01/15/2010 at 7:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, I dressed up, went over to my boyfriend and told him he could do anything he wanted. He said nothing and walked outside. I figured he'd come back in shortly, but when I looked out the window a few minutes later, he was building a snowman. FML

#7239048
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (10451)

On 01/09/2010 at 4:20pm - love - by dollybabe (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my pet hedgehog thought it would be funny to roll around in the kitty litter. It was like washing a poopy cactus. FML

Today, the doctor told me that I have Vasovagal Syncope: I pass out every time I get aroused. Bye bye sex. FML

#7198357
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38205) - you deserved it (2423)

On 01/07/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Sanchez (man) - United States

Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML

#7179468
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47245) - you deserved it (2246)

On 01/06/2010 at 9:55am - misc - by driver (man) - United States (Illinois)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: