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Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (15888) - you deserved it (27943)
On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was in the car hooking up with my boyfriend. He was on top of me when I noticed my neighbor jogging toward the car. Instead of hiding, I felt compelled to wave as he jogged past us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4986) - you deserved it (27240)
On 11/11/2010 at 8:34am - intimacy - by Caught (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my friend and I dressed up as dice for Halloween. The rest of the night consisted of us, harassed by drunks asking, 'Can we roll you around?' and constantly being shaken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7377) - you deserved it (19967)
On 10/30/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Japan (Tokyo)
Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15347) - you deserved it (18577)
On 10/17/2010 at 2:28am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28960) - you deserved it (16287)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, while taking a shower, I thought that the bathroom was extra steamy because of all the hot water. It wasn't until two-three minutes later when I put some shampoo in my hair that I realized I had forgotten to take my glasses off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5348) - you deserved it (25137)
On 10/05/2010 at 6:46am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)
Today, I bought a new Ipod to replace my old one which decided to stop working. After purchasing my new nano Ipod, I decided to bang my old Ipod on the desk very hard because it was useless. It started working again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18114) - you deserved it (6620)
On 09/27/2010 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Today, I went on a first date to the movies. During the flick, I choked on a piece of popcorn. I took a gulp of soda and that got stuck as well. I finally got my breath back and let out the loudest burp I ever have. He looked at me and said "Does this mean I can fart now?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (12368) - you deserved it (18646)
On 09/27/2010 at 7:45am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26125) - you deserved it (5108)
On 09/26/2010 at 7:14pm - work - by lyssuhhhh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and superiors as well as our clients. About two hours in I started playing with the lid of the pen I was using, next thing I saw was the lid flicking up and hitting my boss square in the middle of the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6057) - you deserved it (16815)
On 09/10/2010 at 2:28am - work - by theshad (man) - Reserved
Today, I found out that I drunkenly texted my boss yesterday asking for nude pictures. He sent them. I'm afraid to go to work tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11270) - you deserved it (26051)
On 09/08/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by WTF?!?! - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years finally asked me to marry him. He said: We could save taxes if we married.. what do you think? That was the most romantic thing he said to me in the last 2 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24301) - you deserved it (8447)
On 08/27/2010 at 5:57am - love - by weddinggirl (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend from the top of a bungee jumping platform at an amusement park. I yelled out, "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" from the platform, pointing her out. Turns out, I was pointing at the wrong girl. My girlfriend was very angry and ran away when the wrong girl yelled, "Yes!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27296) - you deserved it (10315)
On 08/26/2010 at 4:06pm - love - by Ido (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14886) - you deserved it (32755)
On 08/15/2010 at 6:31pm - intimacy - by Peekaman (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6956) - you deserved it (29082)
On 08/02/2010 at 5:50am - work - by Julia (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)
Monday 17 June 2013
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