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Ninjin1986

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Ninjin1986
  • Town/Country : Frankfurt, Germany
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1982
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Ninjin1986 : Well, not so new here anymore, but still looking for people to talk to. So don't hesitate, just message me :)

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Ninjin1986's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26356) - you deserved it (2568) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I discovered that my three-year-old daughter has mastered the art of pickpocketing. While I was driving to work this morning, my car broke down. I reached in my pocket to call AAA on my cell, only to find her squirt gun in its place. FML

#19612373
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17984) - you deserved it (2193)

On 05/12/2012 at 4:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my pet mouse demonstrated that he has bigger balls than my boyfriend, by running across the dinner table and eating off his plate, all while he jumped out of his chair, screaming like a girl. FML

#19592070
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18145) - you deserved it (3786)

On 05/08/2012 at 12:41pm - animals - by gl0b3suck0r (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

#19438168
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21190) - you deserved it (2430)

On 04/09/2012 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML

#19349740
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22753) - you deserved it (2421)

On 03/26/2012 at 5:11am - intimacy - by pmek - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML

#19319473
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22275) - you deserved it (2558)

On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

#19255616
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26164) - you deserved it (2554)

On 03/11/2012 at 3:36am - love - by Tristan Brantley - United States (California)

Today, my mother surprised me with a new alarm clock. It's attached to a toy car which races around my room with obnoxious sirens going at full blast until I crawl out of bed and turn it off. She says this will be a regular thing. FML

#19180349
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17944) - you deserved it (11152)

On 02/28/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by poop - United States

Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML

#19126336
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20124) - you deserved it (1653)

On 02/20/2012 at 9:15pm - misc - by Carpet cleaner (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML

#18976256
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51380) - you deserved it (3111)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by kingpig (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

#18966700
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26800) - you deserved it (3383)

On 02/01/2012 at 3:19am - intimacy - by crybaby - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML

#18842582
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22228) - you deserved it (4712)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:30am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

#18802490
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23089) - you deserved it (8033)

On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

#18750908
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20106) - you deserved it (3191)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19011) - you deserved it (37891)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia



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