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Nickenator

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Nickenator
  • Town/Country : LA, United States of America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 May 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 824
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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Today, I ended up gashing my leg rather badly on the corner of a chair, fell to the ground with a very loud thud, and yelled "OH F*CK ME!!". I hobbled to the bathroom making more noise in the process. My neighbor came by and asked if I could "keep my sex noise to a minimum". FML

#4777609
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34396) - you deserved it (6702)

On 08/24/2009 at 3:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#4728013
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (4962)

On 08/22/2009 at 2:29am - kids - by NoCookForYou (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML

#4678208
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12838) - you deserved it (33186)

On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

#4637795
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50800) - you deserved it (4213)

On 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by Girl - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107824) - you deserved it (8044)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

#4596913
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55369) - you deserved it (11851)

On 08/17/2009 at 9:50am - misc - by malebonding (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54470) - you deserved it (4486)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

#4505034
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33410) - you deserved it (76086)

On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sneaking over to my girlfriend's house. I sent her mother a text message thinking it was my girlfriend saying "There's a stalker coming in to make you his play mate ;]" Unfortunately when I got to her window I was greeted by her dad with a bat. FML

#4454035
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8443) - you deserved it (62911)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:30pm - love - by Ohfman117 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sneaking over to my girlfriend's house. I sent her mother a text message thinking it was my girlfriend saying "There's a stalker coming in to make you his play mate ;]" Unfortunately when I got to her window I was greeted by her dad with a bat. FML

#4454035
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8443) - you deserved it (62911)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:30pm - love - by Ohfman117 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

#4275637
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40681) - you deserved it (17973)

On 08/04/2009 at 3:55am - love - by Ouchithurt (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML

#4157203
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32636) - you deserved it (2896)

On 07/30/2009 at 9:56am - kids - by Rae (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I had two minutes to get to the bus stop which usually takes me eight minutes. I had to catch that bus to be at work at the hospital in time. I was in such a hurry, I didn't have the time to tie my shoe laces. I ran with untied shoe laces. I did end up in the hospital. FML

#4108973
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32036) - you deserved it (12921)

On 07/28/2009 at 2:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Finnmark)

Today, it was my boyfriends birthday and I saw he was logged in on ooVoo. He sent me a request to video chat so I decided to take off all of my clothes to surprise him. Little did I know, his entire family was at his house and at the computer because he, "wanted to show them what a great girlfriend I am." FML

#4050970
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21980) - you deserved it (67256)

On 07/26/2009 at 9:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

#3967657
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67055) - you deserved it (4062)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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