About NewMetalGirl : I love metalcore, it is THE best music genre out there. My favorite bands are Atreyu, Bullet For My Valentine, Five Finger Death Punch, A Day To Remember, Pierce The Veil, Falling In Reverse, Black Veil Brides. I LOVE music, I would either be insane or dead without it. Message me if you want to know more about me.
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NewMetalGirl's favorite FMLs
Today, my sister went into a blind rage at me for "upstaging" her by announcing that I'm pregnant, two months after she did the same. My husband and I have been trying for two years. She's in high school and doesn't even know who the father is. FML
by bntje / 04/14/2013 at 4:39pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Miscellaneous
by QuinnyZebrass / 04/02/2013 at 12:11am / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML
by LadySteveMartin / 04/01/2013 at 8:18pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by uhoh / 02/16/2013 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by swollenpenis / 01/25/2013 at 1:11am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML
by Anonymous / 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML
by orgasmicriding / 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation
Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML
by daughterinlaw / 12/18/2012 at 12:09pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
by Steve / 12/16/2012 at 1:25am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML
by LearnGeographyUSA / 12/12/2012 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, my hand hit his shoulder and I dropped my phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, my dad was staring at us from outside. He still appears to think I was giving him head. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML
by SamWGovan / 12/09/2012 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
by AllegroRubato / 12/04/2012 at 3:09pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…