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About MrsPegg : I love reading about poor souls and their sh*tty days. Priding myself on taking joy out of others misery while lessening mine. Been on FML for a while now and am currently in a psychiatric program for my severe and utter intolerance to bullsh*t.
Most of the time I'm joking or being an internet therapist. Use your own judgement to decide which one I am...
I don't check my messages too often, but PM if you wanna.
I also will give a fuck, for a fuck. Fucks for fucks sake. Just shoot me a fucking message if you want one, because I can't keep up with the fucking profile views on the app I use. Also, I sometimes give a Fuck but it disappears, so let me know if I owe you one.
If you've read down this far, I hope you have a good day and that FML made your FML just a tad bit less FMLy.
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.
How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?
You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!
Today, I received a beautiful, heart-felt text from my boyfriend detailing all the ways he loved me. He probably should have emphasized just how big his heart is though because he sent the text to three other women too. Thank you, group messaging. FML
Today, a guy hit on me. It's such a rare occurrence that I didn't know how to react, so I panicked and said "Sorry, I have to go!" Then I remembered we were on a bus, and just turned around and awkwardly pretended he wasn't there. FML
Today, at my daughter's wedding celebration, I was doing a Michael Jackson act with a few buddies. It went well until I did the crotch-grab. I yanked my balls too hard and fell to the floor, writhing in agony in front of nearly 70 guests. FML
Today, during a driving lesson, I stopped behind a taxi, and got more and more annoyed when the traffic wouldn't move. A few minutes later, my instructor couldn't hold his laughter any more and pointed out I'd somehow zoned out and entered a taxi rank. FML
Today, while teaching my class, I hooked my laptop up to the projector and put on a documentary. I left it playing and went to the toilet. When I came back the whole class was talking to my mother. She must've Skyped me while I was gone and someone answered the call. FML
Tuesday 24 November 2015