Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrsPegg

Search for a member

MrsPegg

375Fucked!

MrsPeggMrsPegg
  • Town/Country : New Orleans, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 July 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 36440
  • Number of comments : 442
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 91 posted

About MrsPegg : I love reading about poor souls and their sh*tty days; taking joy out of others misery while somewhat lessening mine. Been on FML for a while now and am currently in treatment for my severe intolerance to bullshit and games.... I am always in the constant struggle of trying to get an FML published, so feel free to follow my FML journey and lets see how high my submission number can get! Woot woot!

I don't check my messages too often, but PM if you wanna. Except you pubescent level horny, living-in-your-parents-basement but-you're-too-damn-old-to ones. Please don't.

I also will give a fuck, for a fuck. Fucks for fucks sake. I sometimes give a Fuck but it disappears, so let me know if I owe you one.



If you've read down this far, I hope you have a good day and that FML made your FML just a tad bit less FMLy.

MrsPegg's page activity

Visits<b>kolom</b> - 9 hours ago<b>battousai1995</b> - 22 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 2:45pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 2:18am<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 11:12pm<b>hare</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 7:33pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:28pm<b>meatball4122</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:11am<b>blcksocks</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:35am<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 12:14am<b>itsellaaaaa</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 12:16pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 7:28am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 10:21am<b>Mr_Brightside_</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 10:08pm<b>Mean_Oreo2436</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 6:47pm<b>Alexxandre</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:44pm<b>jackassthebadass</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:25am<b>sheeshadevil</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:55pm

Fucked!<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 5:12am<b>hullarms</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 6:58pm<b>Cyntha</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:14pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:27am<b>johny93</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 5:26pm<b>myselfkk</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 4:44pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:08am<b>YourOpinionSucks</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 2:09am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 9:54am<b>Lesser</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:48pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:33am<b>ManUtdFan743</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 2:26am<b>CCRider</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 5:07am<b>niallo</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 3:20am<b>ixyasmine</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 7:06pm<b>bwoolf96</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 6:55pm<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 6:28pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 6:09pm

MrsPegg's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of MrsPegg's badges

MrsPegg's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71057) - you deserved it (20145)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out that the girl I've been talking to online and sending certain pictures to is actually my ex's new boyfriend. He ended up telling me he'd just wanted to see how he compared to me down below because my ex refused to go into detail about it. FML

#20698485
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51136) - you deserved it (23892)

On 06/01/2013 at 12:03am - intimacy - by WTF (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mum made me take her poodle on a walk, which she'd dressed in a tiara and a pink dog dress. Being a 19-year-old guy, I was pissed. After I got home, I saw that my mom had filmed me from the window and posted it to Facebook, to everyone's great delight. FML

#20695533
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49391) - you deserved it (5837)

On 05/30/2013 at 4:25pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66759) - you deserved it (5396)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the doorbell rang. I saw my incredibly overbearing mum's car outside, so I stayed quiet and tried to sneak upstairs. As I crawled through the hallway, commando style, I realised the door blinds were still out for cleaning. If scowls could kill, I'd be roasting in Hell right now. FML

#20694934
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42541) - you deserved it (10504)

On 05/30/2013 at 8:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML

#20694473
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57937) - you deserved it (9578)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML

#20694089
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48487) - you deserved it (9535)

On 05/29/2013 at 9:53pm - misc - by paulinapo - United States (New York)

Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML

#20692661
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68614) - you deserved it (15231)

On 05/29/2013 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67664) - you deserved it (15475)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was working at a place where if you're tipped, you sing. After a lady paid for her ice cream, she pulled out 5 dollars. Thinking it was a tip, I took it, and sang the song. She didn't mean to tip me. I was stopped by the woman slapping me. FML

#20690062
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45210) - you deserved it (14608)

On 05/27/2013 at 8:56pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72445) - you deserved it (6104)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38217) - you deserved it (3542)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML

#20677562
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29280) - you deserved it (42314)

On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

#20675286
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51575) - you deserved it (4516)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by well okay then - Canada (Alberta)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: