Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrsPegg

Online | Search for a member

MrsPegg

50Fucked!

MrsPeggMrsPegg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 July 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 24554
  • Number of comments : 334
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About MrsPegg : I love reading about poor souls and their sh*tty days. Priding myself on taking joy out of others misery. Been on FML for a while now and am currently in a psychiatric program for my severe and utter intolerance to bullsh*t.

For those who like to use FML as a dating platform: I like guns, fast cars, whiskey, sex, horror/thriller/action movies, long walks on the beach, deep/intellectual conversation and roses.






Side note: Hopefully you'll know and see that 99% of the time I'm being sarcastic... You're warned.

MrsPegg's page activity

Visits<b>itsalise</b> - 5 hours ago<b>swag420xoxo</b> - 5 hours ago<b>gobiteme2</b> - 6 hours ago<b>infantrysoldier</b> - 7 hours ago<b>cabub007</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Hrodrik</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Jiratias</b> - 9 hours ago<b>thatkid00117</b> - 9 hours ago<b>PackersBacker</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Woody02284</b> - 11 hours ago<b>mads_nicole</b> - 12 hours ago<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - 13 hours ago<b>feven</b> - 14 hours ago<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - 14 hours ago<b>kayzers</b> - 14 hours ago<b>badmandilon</b> - 15 hours ago<b>russfml</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - 15 hours ago

Fucked!<b>cabub007</b> - one hour ago<b>Jiratias</b> - 3 hours ago<b>feven</b> - 8 hours ago<b>russfml</b> - 9 hours ago<b>lurch87</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 11:49am<b>quesok</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:45am<b>ENCOURAGER</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 8:44pm<b>jazzehg</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:50pm<b>GodfriedGrobler</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:48pm<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:37am<b>briang959</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 1:41pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 8:47pm<b>amine91</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 9:30pm<b>ManUtdforlife</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 7:10pm<b>swanheart</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:29pm<b>wmt1978</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 9:29pm<b>boboates</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 6:17pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 2:09pm

MrsPegg's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of MrsPegg's badges

MrsPegg's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45435) - you deserved it (5997)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32224) - you deserved it (9004)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

#20450521
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38452) - you deserved it (5791)

On 01/09/2013 at 6:55pm - love - by GDBeast (man) - United States

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34467) - you deserved it (2781)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my wife has the flu, while I have strep throat. We have a two-year-old toddler and have no clue as to who's more contagious and who should take care of her as to not get her sick. Yay for the entire day of surgical masks and Sesame Street. FML

#20448554
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26504) - you deserved it (2338)

On 01/08/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Curly (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

#20447919
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32586) - you deserved it (4535)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML

#20447616
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26516) - you deserved it (5848)

On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

#20447288
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42328) - you deserved it (8119)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML

#20445950
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34100) - you deserved it (6920)

On 01/07/2013 at 8:01am - intimacy - by wetsheets (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML

#20442876
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21197) - you deserved it (3953)

On 01/04/2013 at 7:31pm - love - by marisa (woman) - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, after a drunken New Year's Eve party with friends, I woke up with a penis on my cheek. It wasn't a drawing. FML

#20438438
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (0) - you deserved it (0) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/02/2013 at 6:15am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

#20436604
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51824) - you deserved it (3993)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:00pm - misc - by apparentlythereisnokarma - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML

#20399692
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19076) - you deserved it (2018)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:20pm - misc - by theslutmuncher (man) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27736) - you deserved it (16185)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27145) - you deserved it (2529)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Juliette's illustrated FML
  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: