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About MrsPegg : I love reading about poor souls and their sh*tty days; taking joy out of others misery while somewhat lessening mine. Been on FML for a while now and am currently in treatment for my severe intolerance to bullshit and games.... I am always in the constant struggle of trying to get an FML published, so feel free to follow my FML journey and lets see how high my submission number can get! Woot woot!
I don't check my messages too often, but PM if you wanna. Except you pubescent level horny, living-in-your-parents-basement but-you're-too-damn-old-to ones. Please don't.
I also will give a fuck, for a fuck. Fucks for fucks sake. I sometimes give a Fuck but it disappears, so let me know if I owe you one.
If you've read down this far, I hope you have a good day and that FML made your FML just a tad bit less FMLy.
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.
How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?
You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!
Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML
Today, after my sister's wedding, a bunch of people were dancing. I noticed my grandma sitting alone and looking sad. My grandpa died last month, so feeling bad for her, I asked if she'd like to dance with me. She seemed a lot happier, until I accidentally caused her to fall and break her arm. FML
Today, I asked my shut in of a daughter why she was sniffing black pepper. She said she was practicing to make her sneezes sound like coughs, thereby decreasing the likelihood of someone talking to her. FML
Today, I wrote my boyfriend a love letter during class and told him to read it when he got home. He texted me later asking me why I gave him my school assignment. I must have handed the love letter in to my teacher. FML
Today, my dad was telling me some childhood stories. He mentioned I once started sucking on a cow's udder when I was 2, and I asked why didn't he stop me. His response: "You were an accident and I wasn't good at the parenting thing". FML
Friday 5 February 2016