Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrsPegg

Offline (8 hours ago) | Search for a member

MrsPegg

1Liked!

MrsPeggMrsPegg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12919
  • Number of comments : 294
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About MrsPegg : I just love a good laugh & FML gives it to me everyday! :)

MrsPegg's page activity

Visits<b>colton_colton</b> - yesterday at 4:19pm<b>cinskeep43</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 12:37am<b>DJisHere11</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 10:50am<b>JuggaloSimms1441</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 9:32am<b>gingerJ</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:32pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:30am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:20pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:56pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:51pm<b>yoloswaggens</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 3:36am<b>mystery_user</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 8:36am<b>FYLTHOUGH</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 8:25am<b>xbobbiee95</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:57am<b>ptoka</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:53am<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:53am<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:49am<b>wGx14</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:42am<b>Wedgietime</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:22am

Liked!<b>colton_colton</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 3:50am

MrsPegg's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of MrsPegg's badges

MrsPegg's favorite FMLs

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26451) - you deserved it (14111)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

#20466497
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31246) - you deserved it (5370)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35401) - you deserved it (3698)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

#20465889
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59310) - you deserved it (6833)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

#20465397
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32466) - you deserved it (2153)

On 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm - animals - by bull-stuff - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML

#20462590
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39202) - you deserved it (3315)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:26pm - health - by SF49 - United States

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36532) - you deserved it (3832)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30873) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41114) - you deserved it (7189)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28719) - you deserved it (3150)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46393) - you deserved it (7928)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I realized I'm so lonely that I get comfort from hearing my neighbor snore through my apartment wall. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45171) - you deserved it (5977)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: