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Today, my boss was handing me a list of phone numbers to call people and terminate them from their jobs here at the company. My phone was on that list. I don't know what's worse, not realizing it was my number until I heard my voicemail or getting terminated from my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28731) - you deserved it (2704)
On 08/21/2009 at 6:12pm - work - by Cally (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29932) - you deserved it (3052)
On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States
Today, I was on a date with a girl I've had feelings for since I was 14 (I'm 22). I took her out to dinner, then to a movie that we both liked and had a few drinks afterwards. I thought it was going really well until I was driving her home and she asked to be dropped off at her boyfriend's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33837) - you deserved it (4530)
On 08/21/2009 at 4:06am - love - by tacoboy (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12588) - you deserved it (32721)
On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47057) - you deserved it (2849)
On 06/30/2009 at 12:17pm - kids - by lebanesewoman (woman) - Hong Kong
Today, I went on a blind date a girl from work had set me up with. Apparently my co-worker thinks I'm gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38959) - you deserved it (3019)
On 06/28/2009 at 12:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML
I agree, your life sucks (39745) - you deserved it (2588)
On 06/21/2009 at 4:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my girlfriend and I were exchanging some naughty pictures. I accidentally sent one to everybody on my contacts, including my ex, my boss, and even Pizza Hut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12604) - you deserved it (51659)
On 06/20/2009 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)
Today, I bought a new mailbox to replace the old one that was stolen. Two hours after I put the new mailbox up, the old one was back and the new one was missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49482) - you deserved it (2305)
On 06/20/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by Dumbass - United States (Florida)
Today, I bought a new mailbox to replace the old one that was stolen. Two hours after I put the new mailbox up, the old one was back and the new one was missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49482) - you deserved it (2305)
On 06/20/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by Dumbass - United States (Florida)
Today, I bought a new mailbox to replace the old one that was stolen. Two hours after I put the new mailbox up, the old one was back and the new one was missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49482) - you deserved it (2305)
On 06/20/2009 at 2:01am - misc - by Dumbass - United States (Florida)
Today, my friend sent me a bumper sticker that said, "Do you know that gullible said slowly sounds like 'green bears'?" I spent quite a few minutes trying to get gullible to sound like green bears until I realized that it didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8262) - you deserved it (45159)
On 06/20/2009 at 12:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9017) - you deserved it (85487)
On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11637) - you deserved it (78891)
On 06/19/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by kat9232000 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I finally got enough courage to ask out this girl that I've liked for a year. While we were out at lunch, she ran into her ex that she had just broken up with. They then had a long conversation about their relationship, and ended up getting back together. She was my ride home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42783) - you deserved it (2342)
On 06/13/2009 at 8:15am - love - by e.middlechild (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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