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MrHomerSimpson

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MrHomerSimpson
  • Town/Country : Springfield, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1808
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MrHomerSimpson : I'm passionate about donuts.
Mmmmm... donuts.

MrHomerSimpson's last visitors

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MrHomerSimpson's FML badges

50 favourites

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Perfectionist

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MrHomerSimpson's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up in my best guy friend's bed to the sound of him jerking off. As I laid there motionless with my back to him, he reached around me to grab a tissue. I don't think I can ever speak to him again. FML

#6676757
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18288) - you deserved it (3858)

On 12/09/2009 at 4:20am - intimacy - by dfkjhregoiuberiug (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
813 comments

I agree, your life sucks (113692) - you deserved it (71757)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML

#1592701
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20737) - you deserved it (78253)

On 05/03/2009 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by danggit3290 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML

#30273
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18277) - you deserved it (44494)

On 02/12/2009 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Evil_Egbert (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML

#6850
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13638) - you deserved it (42208)

On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

#2357
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12072) - you deserved it (36575)

On 01/23/2009 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by killmyself - United States (California)



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