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MrHomerSimpson

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MrHomerSimpson
  • Town/Country : Springfield, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1817
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About MrHomerSimpson : I'm passionate about donuts.
Mmmmm... donuts.

MrHomerSimpson's last visitors

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MrHomerSimpson's FML badges

50 favourites

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Consolation prize

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Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

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MrHomerSimpson's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
472 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38427) - you deserved it (3081)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

#19627538
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18091) - you deserved it (5759)

On 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm - misc - by FML (woman) - Finland

Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "what birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML

#19626736
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14383) - you deserved it (24991)

On 05/15/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15277) - you deserved it (2048)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet.  A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML

#19609899
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7989) - you deserved it (45571)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9488) - you deserved it (53703)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

#19608158
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18952) - you deserved it (5422)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by rongo12 (man) -

Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10685) - you deserved it (18499)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

#19598679
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26076) - you deserved it (2795)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I started my new job. It seems my colleagues are moronic pranksters, because when I leaned back in my chair, the back-rest fell apart and I fell to the ground, to much laughter. My boss immediately shouted at me to "stop fucking about." FML

#19598076
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15429) - you deserved it (1210)

On 05/09/2012 at 4:10pm - work - by dan (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, as I got off the bus, I saw a girl counting her change making sure she had enough for the ride. Since it was my last stop for the day, I offered my day pass to her. She replied, "Get away, freak." FML

#19597071
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26522) - you deserved it (2183)

On 05/09/2012 at 10:40am - misc - by calidreaming - Japan (Osaka)

Today, as I got off the bus, I saw a girl counting her change making sure she had enough for the ride. Since it was my last stop for the day, I offered my day pass to her. She replied, "Get away, freak." FML

#19597071
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26522) - you deserved it (2183)

On 05/09/2012 at 10:40am - misc - by calidreaming - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

#19593515
454 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11843) - you deserved it (32169)

On 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28072) - you deserved it (2843)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

#19589899
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18833) - you deserved it (5627)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States



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