Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MisterDoctor

Search for a member

MisterDoctor
  • Town/Country : California
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3279
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About MisterDoctor : I'm no real doctor, but seeing as how this is the Internet, I'll give it a try.

MisterDoctor's last visitors

haylburggianni21izzie321drkrissy1331BlackNinja787

MisterDoctor's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of MisterDoctor's badges

MisterDoctor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML

#20024327
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18429) - you deserved it (4644)

On 08/16/2012 at 11:16am - love - by Amberain (woman) - United Kingdom (Halton)

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

#20020311
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21914) - you deserved it (6535)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26642) - you deserved it (7723)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)

Today, I was at a gas station when the cash register made a sound effect similar to one from Sonic the Hedgehog, and I pointed this out. The cashier then saw fit to go on a rant about how I need to stop focusing on video games, and get a life and a girlfriend. FML

#20006832
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17233) - you deserved it (5905)

On 08/07/2012 at 12:16am - misc - by Marcowalker95 - United States (California)

Today, my mom thought I was flying high on weed and nearly grounded me for it. I wasn't high, I was just actually in a good mood for the first time in a few weeks. FML

#19999290
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18376) - you deserved it (1342)

On 08/02/2012 at 10:14pm - misc - by HappyMan (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she never takes dumps. I told her that as long as she eats, it's a biological impossibility, but she seems to have genuinely deluded herself into thinking it's true, purely because she is a girl. FML

#19997167
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16251) - you deserved it (2044)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

#19910380
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16710) - you deserved it (6383)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

#19903031
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58981) - you deserved it (4705)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25812) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (3816)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I found out that my wife and two teenage daughters' periods are all one week after the other. I am living in hell almost every single day. FML

#19786572
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28527) - you deserved it (3518)

On 06/14/2012 at 10:54am - misc - by anonymous - China (Jiangsu)

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38460) - you deserved it (3667)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I loved her. I tried to be cute and romantic and responded with a quote from the Notebook, which I watched with her yesterday. After I said, "If you're a bird, I'm a bird," she broke up with me because I was "phony and unoriginal." FML

#19768681
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23884) - you deserved it (8813)

On 06/11/2012 at 1:25am - love - by thanksnicksparks (man) - United States

Today, while at the beach, as a joke, I told my girlfriend that I was a shark. She then poked my eyes and punched me in the nose. When I started to get mad, she just shrugged and asked, "What? You're the one that wanted to be a shark. Don't you watch Shark Week?" FML

#19767813
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9088) - you deserved it (25161)

On 06/10/2012 at 10:33pm - misc - by sharkboy (man) - United States (Hawaii)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: