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Offline (the 06/19/2015 at 11:32am) | Search for a member
About Miss_Klutzie : Nena is what people call me.
19 years old.
I'm not sure why FML keeps changing my birthday but it is August 13th.
Cali bound girl :)
Anything else, feel free to ask(:
Find me on instagram or snapchat! @msklutzy -ig
And no, I don't want anything either so don't tell me i should make a kik, whatsapp (whatever that is) or anything else. I'm not big on all that stuff, plus i have no phone memory for that bullshit 😂😂
anyways, have a good day. :)
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You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Today, my youngest daughter finally started using the toilet on her own. That is, until her older sister showed her the South Park episode where someone gets their intestines sucked out by flushing the toilet. Now she won't go anywhere near the bathroom. FML
Today, I was at an outdoors Christmas party and I jokingly complained that my son says 'mama' way more than he says 'dada'. One of my students was at the party and watched him for a couple of hours. He taught him to say 'dada' every time he sees a bug. FML
Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML
Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML
Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML
Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML
Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML
Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML
Monday 5 October 2015