About Miss_Blaine : Two ratties and one shiba pup make for a very happy life. Iowa native happily transplanted in Texas
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Miss_Blaine's favorite FMLs
by ai_lauren / 12/18/2014 at 11:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
Today, I had a job interview that I was quite nervous about. During the interview, I struggled to get my words out and the interviewer angrily told me to, "Get on with it." I continued to struggle and was later kicked out for wasting their time. I have a stutter. FML
by abcdefghijkl1233 / 10/29/2013 at 9:23am / United Kingdom (Oldham) / Work
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML
by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend meeting all of his friends for the first time. My boyfriend went into the kitchen to get me a drink, and after ten minutes I went looking for him. I discovered his friend holding two melons to his chest, mid explanation on how they look exactly like mine. FML
by Anonymous / 09/20/2009 at 8:00am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to be totally honest with each other. We even told some of our deepest, darkest secrets, in hopes of strengthening our relationship. He told me he had a diaper fetish, and would love to see me in one. There goes my sex life. FML
by Maria39018 / 08/01/2009 at 2:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML
by Jinthebar / 05/06/2009 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Love
Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
by MrAwsum / 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
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- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…