MissSkinnyJeans

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Offline (the 02/18/2015 at 3:26am)

MissSkinnyJeans

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 July 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 294
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MissSkinnyJeans's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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MissSkinnyJeans's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

by cactii / 02/16/2015 at 3:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after 3 hours of sleep, I had to rush to my grandmother's house because she fell and couldn't get up. An embarrassed, half-naked old lady, a very wet rug, an ambulance and a trip to the hospital later, and she still refuses to use her cane and walker. I hope I'm not this stubborn when I'm old. FML

by CatLady4Lyf / 02/16/2015 at 9:22am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2015 at 1:01am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

by jessybear777 / 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, my mom's obsession with cleanliness hit a new low when she bitched at me for having trash in my trash can. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2015 at 2:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, while skiing down a steep mountain, a man ran over my skis, causing me to fall and roll down the slope. When I regained my balance, I saw the man had followed me just to say "How graceful" and continue on. FML

by jostertoaster12 / 02/13/2015 at 3:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2015 at 3:24pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband fell asleep while cuddling. I didn't want to wake him, so I lay there for ages, trying to fall asleep. Just as I finally dozed off, my leg uncontrollably jerked and hit him in the nuts. He's convinced I did it deliberately as revenge for an argument we had 5 days ago. FML

by Innocence / 02/13/2015 at 12:33pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML

by TheKingKen / 02/13/2015 at 3:40am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I discovered that my male coworker, who coincidentally shares my last name, has been telling everyone we're married. I'm 26; he's 58. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2015 at 3:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I announced to my friends that my grandmother is dying. My best friend pulled out his phone and casually announced, "Technically, everyone is dying." FML

by Dartfrogger / 02/12/2015 at 2:16pm / United States (Utah) / Health

Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML

by Mkimmi / 02/12/2015 at 2:39am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy