About Mischief109 : I love softball and I read fmls to make my life seem better :)
YDI master
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Today, while waiting for a bus, someone started smoking at the bus shelter, which is illegal in my city. I politely asked him to stop smoking, citing the city ordinance. He just cackled and said that if I'm so concerned about the state of my health, I should start by losing 90 pounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14432) - you deserved it (29433)
On 06/07/2012 at 1:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my friends were coming to pick me up from volleyball practice. When their car pulled up, I jumped in. It was really quiet, so I looked up, only to find I had gotten in the wrong car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15224) - you deserved it (6723)
On 05/26/2012 at 7:00pm - misc - by HorcruxDelight73 - United States (Washington)
Today, I was at my new boyfriend's flat. As I came out of the toilet he walked over, took my hand, looked at me and whispered, "You washed your hands. Good." in an extremely creepy manner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13269) - you deserved it (1829)
On 05/11/2012 at 1:03am - misc - by Lizofsmeg (woman) - United States
Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27048) - you deserved it (1742)
On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)
Today, I have my very first gynecologist appointment. I'm 15. My mom wants to "be on the safe side" and make sure I'm not sexually active. This is my punishment for being a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26135) - you deserved it (2285)
On 09/07/2011 at 12:57pm - health - by AudraRose - United States
Today, I went shopping with my cousin. Walking down the road, I heard her say "Can you hold my hand?" I was confused, but thought it was cute, so I held her hand and kept walking. It turns out she'd asked me to hold her bag. We didn't say another word after that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (5593)
On 05/19/2011 at 8:51am - misc - by awkwardd (man) - Hong Kong
Today, I was singing and playing keyboards with my band on stage at a club. A drunken chick from the crowd tried to climb up onto the stage in her heels, fell, and grabbed the back of my mic stand to catch herself. And busted me in the mouth with my own microphone. Then she requested a song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18079) - you deserved it (1592)
On 09/20/2010 at 12:47am - misc - by northernlass (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I finally worked up the courage to talk to this hot guy in my law school contracts class. His response? "I'm no fashion expert, but I don't think you're supposed to wear purple underwear with white pants. Not that it matters, though, because your zipper is wide open." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13508) - you deserved it (29753)
On 05/18/2010 at 1:22am - love - by Dana422 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was walking out of class when I saw a girl enthusiastically run to her boyfriend, jump on him, and smother him with kisses. I thought to myself "I wish my girlfriend did that." When the girl jumped off and turned around I realized she did, just not to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46071) - you deserved it (2128)
On 10/06/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by zitroskies (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went to a concert. Knowing these concerts usually include a lot of black lights, I decided to wear a black T-shirt so I wouldn't glow. I was having a good time, but about halfway through I noticed someone pointing to my shoulder. I looked down to see my dandruff glowing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26582) - you deserved it (12202)
On 08/26/2009 at 12:29am - misc - by Raaar (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29098) - you deserved it (8175)
On 08/22/2009 at 5:07am - health - by Buggga (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was texting a friend of mine. She mentioned it was her dad's birthday. I typed "Tell him Happy Birthday for me!" and as I pressed send I remember her dad was dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17399) - you deserved it (31725)
On 06/24/2009 at 8:11am - misc - by blind (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, my cell phone rang while I was still asleep. I picked it up, half asleep, only to find it was a wrong number from some guy. Three minutes later I receive a text message saying "Hey, you sound cute..." from the same number. I looked to see if he was local. I'm that desperate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46029) - you deserved it (7233)
On 05/13/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by paprgrl421 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (132506) - you deserved it (8272)
On 05/05/2009 at 8:22am - money - by Fitz (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I realized that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12161) - you deserved it (59423)
On 04/08/2009 at 4:34pm - misc - by UGH (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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