oh well... FML
U want some real FML? go to sudan or remote parts of africa where rape and death is everyday's FML for lots of ppl.
Life generally sucks but its usually worse for the next guy. so man up and move on. life deserves to be lived right for those who can. Some just don't have a choice.
Peace
Seriously FML isn't what it was..
I thought of something. Has anyone realised that most FML's are written by total strangers that suddenly pop up on FML?? but when normal FML members want to write an FML it does not work?? auto generated FML's?? mmhh... What say you?
Since FML MOD's wnt allow my FML ill post it here for those who wanna know...
Today, while driving on a narrow road, i hit another van coming towards me.. it was the mirrors that hit. nothing bad really, until we both stop and the other dude decides to jump on my van and starts to hit it.. well since that wasn't enough for him he decided to hit me too.. Now thats a FML!!
Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51067) - you totally deserved it (6384)
On 06/25/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was at the beach walking on the boardwalk without a shirt on. Two cute girls are walking my way and I decide to try and impress them by flexing my abs. While I flexed them, I accidentally let a fart out that everyone heard. Everybody, including the girls, laughed hysterically at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7973) - you totally deserved it (51885)
On 04/07/2009 at 12:12pm - misc - by gotmon3y (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was walking down the street with my acoustic guitar on my back. I saw a girl that I like coming down the opposite way, so I decided to play my guitar to try and impress her. I started to tune it quickly, but while I wasn't paying attention, I ran into a pole. Now my guitar is cracked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12705) - you totally deserved it (51367)
On 04/01/2009 at 1:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
I agree, your life sucks (13316) - you totally deserved it (47829)
On 03/31/2009 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I finally had my tongue piercing heal up so I decided to try oral on my girl. Unfortunately, she has a hood piercing that got caught on my tongue ring, and neither of us could get them apart. We had to call my mom in to solve the problem. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37859) - you totally deserved it (74427)
On 03/25/2009 at 5:04pm - intimacy - by Unicron (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23081) - you totally deserved it (54937)
On 03/25/2009 at 10:13am - misc - by nomorebeard (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51188) - you totally deserved it (5540)
On 03/18/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Miller_Time (man) - United States
Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (190264) - you totally deserved it (101869)
On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36990) - you totally deserved it (68122)
On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled : "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (220140) - you totally deserved it (243863)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection. My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (384113) - you totally deserved it (67211)
On 02/27/2009 at 2:52pm - intimacy - by jgondi1 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
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