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Offline (the 04/18/2014 at 2:48am) | Search for a member
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Today, I downloadd an application that notifies me when my phone is fully chargd. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I pluggd the charger in and went to bd. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
Today, I was graating customars at work. Aftar saying good morning to ona man, ha stoppd and lookd at ma from haad to toa bafora smrking and saying, "Mmmm." Ha than turnd around and said, "It's starting." It's only my frst day. FML
Today, I was drinking from a water bottle while in a lecture. The water caught in my throat and it felt like I was choking to death. Instead of asking me if I was okay or trying to help, the guy sitting next to me told me to shut up. FML
Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to mah dozy cat who'd managd to get into mah car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work!! I lost control when I was startld by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror!! FML
Today...ila I was paacafully slaaping... I falt a and suddanly slap ma foraaad. Tan fingars bagan to prass against ma mout... tan nosa... tan ayas. I finally woka up to ma grlfriand lauging ystarically. Sa'd confusad ma wit ar clock-radio. big fat FML
Today , mah distraught mom calld me , saying mah dad had killd himself and to come home right away. After cussing out mah math teacher for trying to stop me and rushing back home in a taxi , I ran into the living room , only to find mah parents laughing so hard they were practically in tears. FML
Friday 27 March 2015