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Metallica36176

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Metallica36176
  • Town/Country : Somewhere in West Virginia, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 September 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 2118
  • Number of comments : 551
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Metallica36176 : I try to find something in every subject I like...so Im kind of easy to get along with. Anything that has to do with Zelda gets an instant like/thumb up. Like if your username, profile pic, or comment has anything to do with it - instant like. :) The only thing I hate about FML is proof that people are assholes. I hate when people are mean for no reason whatsoever. It pisses me off to see some asshole reply to a comment with a stupid smartass remark such as "No. Just no." People have the right to comment but just stop being dicks. Now if they are being that way first and deserve it cool, but there is no reason to just be an ass.

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Metallica36176's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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Metallica36176's favorite FMLs

Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML

#19109811
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23780) - you deserved it (16521)

On 02/18/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Lilah - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

#19030539
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19388) - you deserved it (9068)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

#19030539
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19388) - you deserved it (9068)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands

Today, my husband bleached his hair so, "our future kids will have blond hair too." I'm already married to this guy. FML

#18904697
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28299) - you deserved it (5456)

On 01/25/2012 at 1:23am - misc - by dragonmirado (woman) - China

Today, a coworker thought it would be funny to put a tack on my chair. When I sat down, it went directly into my butt. When I sprang up, I hit my head on a lamp. I then hit my head on my desk on the way down. FML

#18904057
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26921) - you deserved it (2357)

On 01/25/2012 at 12:03am - work - by Benjamin - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML

#18898417
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33428) - you deserved it (2890)

On 01/24/2012 at 12:31pm - love - by Allergic (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

#18896901
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14280) - you deserved it (27024)

On 01/24/2012 at 3:50am - intimacy - by elisimo - United States (New York)

Today, my job at a luxurious retirement community was terminated when I ran over an old lady with my work golf cart. FML

#18852472
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7178) - you deserved it (43610)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

#18813229
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27162) - you deserved it (22097)

On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24042) - you deserved it (13187)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19012) - you deserved it (37894)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

#18729935
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10378) - you deserved it (50671)

On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

#18725237
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19293) - you deserved it (6608)

On 01/06/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

#18716901
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34128) - you deserved it (4592) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm - animals - by Fat_abott - France

Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML

#18697253
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22427) - you deserved it (5961)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:44pm - animals - by vanessa560 - Canada (Ontario)



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