Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MeltedBrain

Offline (the 12/09/2014 at 5:40pm) | Search for a member

MeltedBrain

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 February 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3707
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

MeltedBrain's page activity

Visits<b>91hayek</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 4:54am<b>ShadowFlame275</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 6:34am<b>FMLkoala</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 5:00am

MeltedBrain's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of MeltedBrain's badges

MeltedBrain's favorite FMLs

Today, after Thanksgiving dinner, we all played Cards Against Humanity. On one round, I was the dealer, and I received "foreskin" as a card. When I said this, my grandmother told me that apparently, after my ritual circumcision, my grandfather buried my foreskin under our rosebushes. FML

#21307273
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28219) - you deserved it (2768)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:25am - misc - by mainlineloser (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend said "You're a real work of art. You know, the abstract kind that no one likes. Anyway, we need to break up." FML

#21302073
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36250) - you deserved it (3090)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML

#21261625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32414) - you deserved it (4867)

On 09/20/2014 at 2:54am - misc - by pasquale - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML

#21249416
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48021) - you deserved it (3843)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:34am - misc - by MLeguillon - United States (Missouri)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19062) - you deserved it (44573)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36065) - you deserved it (5972)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44305) - you deserved it (8286)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50697) - you deserved it (6637)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

#21203004
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39766) - you deserved it (4854)

On 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm - animals - by Jack00412 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML

#21198613
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38934) - you deserved it (4131)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:41pm - kids - by neryc (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML

#21197738
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41621) - you deserved it (17434)

On 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm - animals - by Snow-White (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

#21192088
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49866) - you deserved it (3671)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

#21187386
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44772) - you deserved it (5574)

On 06/25/2014 at 12:29am - misc - by pierced. - United States (Nevada)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: