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Melix

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Melix

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1242
  • Number of comments : 138
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About Melix : Raggedy man, goodnight.

Kidneys! I have new kidneys! I don't like the color.

Melix's page activity

Visits<b>foxwasalamb</b> - 5 hours ago<b>bad_wolff</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Iwtumn</b> - 12 hours ago<b>JensenAckles</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:00pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:54pm<b>AnonymousSpock</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:00am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:53am<b>xsydneyx123</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:59pm<b>MsRenoldsEA</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 5:10pm<b>67_mustang_coupe</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:16pm<b>zuzuily</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:16pm<b>colby6666</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:53pm<b>cwhquest17</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 2:21am<b>pwnapple99</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:02am<b>wafflegost</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 3:40pm<b>obviously_abz</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 9:37pm<b>Harpy</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 8:11pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 2:06pm

Melix's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Melix's badges

Melix's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

#20981063
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44709) - you deserved it (5558)

On 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by KarateKid76 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he thought he heard another guy in the room when he called me, and that I'm cheating on him. The guy he heard was a character from a cartoon my sister was watching. FML

#20958917
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40073) - you deserved it (3088)

On 11/15/2013 at 5:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51068) - you deserved it (5305)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

#20927152
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43128) - you deserved it (4405)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:06am - love - by ShittyProposal - United States (Ohio)

Today, my bully made me cry once again. It's been going on for weeks. I don't know who to turn to; I can't say anything because I'd get into even more trouble. He even stole my Nintendo 3DS and won't give it back. My bully is my girlfriend's son. He's 10. FML

#20904358
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29709) - you deserved it (49384)

On 10/02/2013 at 4:12am - kids - by PickedOnByDamien (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML

#20902425
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44243) - you deserved it (3263)

On 09/30/2013 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, we got my dad an iPad for his birthday. I had to repeatedly reassure him that he could in fact touch the screen without being shocked. FML

#20899491
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36545) - you deserved it (3526)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, in a fit of jealousy over my recent muscle growth, my brother told our mom that I've only been going to the gym so I could smoke weed with my friends. She believed him and grounded me. FML

#20899473
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40044) - you deserved it (2521)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML

#20872521
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46441) - you deserved it (4609)

On 09/08/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that if I say "make a sandwich", it doesn't matter what context it's in, or whether it's a command or just me describing my day; I'll be yelled at anyway by my hipster roommate for being a "sexist cunt", then end up apologizing just to get her to shut up. FML

#20868968
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35336) - you deserved it (5043)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55732) - you deserved it (4414)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a homeless man. As we left the train he shook my hand and was seemingly on his way. That was until he caught me greeting my boyfriend, to which he decided to tell the romantic story of how he murdered a man for "getting too close to his woman." FML

#20845971
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39860) - you deserved it (2733)

On 08/20/2013 at 4:38am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I broke into tears at work after being told my aunt had a stroke. My boss told me to "suck it up, no one is that close to their aunt." My aunt adopted me when my mother passed away. FML

Today, I watched TV in the early morning. I was watching The Ring, and when the scene came on where the girl is crawling out of the TV, my dad grabbed my shoulders from behind me out of nowhere, causing me to shriek like a little bitch. I don't know how long he waited to do that. FML

#20838885
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42726) - you deserved it (7701)

On 08/15/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by insomniac x2 (woman) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, while at a concert, my boyfriend got mad and jealous because I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48828) - you deserved it (6169)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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