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Meettitan's favorite FMLs
by lululand315 / 10/11/2016 at 10:40am / United States (District of Columbia) / Money
Today, someone spilled ammonium hydroxide in ethanol solution in the lab, which smells like very concentrated urine. Since the experiment involved Bunsen burners, we couldn't turn on the fans. We had to work in a lab that smelled like Satan's piss for 2 hours. FML
by r1has / 09/12/2016 at 4:21am / Pakistan (Punjab) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spent a ridiculous amount of time working and reworking a design for a client. Eight hours and many tears later, she sends an email saying, "Let's go with the first design. I liked that one the most." FML
by averagemom4days / 09/06/2016 at 10:45pm / United States (Utah) / Work
by weirdoe / 02/07/2016 at 4:17am / Italy (Sicilia) / Intimacy
by cuntingbitchofawhore / 02/05/2016 at 10:11pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML
by Anonymous / 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm / United States (Maryland) / Health
by lookwhereyasittin / 01/24/2016 at 12:47pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML
by fuckoffgramps / 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I opened the cupboard and a bag of flour fell on my head, covering me from head to toe. Last night I got drunk, and set some booby traps up around the house for my roommate. I'd forgot that my roommate moved out a week ago. FML
by almostadult / 01/14/2016 at 9:13am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work a customer yelled at me, called me a 'fucking bitch', 'a fat whore', and, told me to lose weight because I wouldn't let her in the grocery store I work at to buy lettuce, after we'd closed. Lettuce for her lizard. FML
by midnightblade163 / 01/13/2016 at 7:06am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
Today, my friend got pulled over. The cops searched the car and found a bong among the stuff we were moving to her new house. When they confronted her with it, she told them it must be mine and that she'd never seen it before. FML
by Anonymous / 07/07/2015 at 3:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was working customer service at a large grocery store. I recently got a small, tasteful septum piercing that is barely visible. As I greeted a customer, she began to gag, held out her hand as though she was fending me off, and said, "I can't. Your nose ring makes me sick." FML
by a_dani365 / 07/06/2015 at 5:37pm / United States (Nebraska) / Holidays
Today, I had to take my daughter to the ER. Her brother had bet she couldn't go the whole day without talking. So to win the bet, she tried to super-glue her lips together so she couldn't accidentally say anything. FML
by 1010110100101101 / 06/19/2015 at 12:07pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by poorlyparented / 06/16/2015 at 8:05am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend forgot to pick our son up from daycare. His excuse? Fighting in a battle in World of Warcraft was far more important and he had to stay absolutely focused. Our son had to wait for two hours. FML
by poor baby / 06/12/2015 at 12:51pm / Germany / Miscellaneous