Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Me_You_Us

Search for a member

Me_You_Us

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 405
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Me_You_Us : Stalking me I see.
Well.
Im a pretty random person.
Unicorns. Love them.
Swans. Hate them. They are evil creatures and freakthe hell out of me. Worst thing is im not even kidding.
Well thats enough weirding you out for now.

Me_You_Us's page activity

Visits<b>andizzle47</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 1:28am<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:43pm<b>CaptainFoxbutt</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 11:34pm<b>sugarshane007</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 11:25pm<b>littlestduck</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 10:39am<b>Aaron98</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 10:35pm<b>BFons</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 5:43pm<b>Behind_walls</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 5:30pm<b>AllegroRubato</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 8:20pm

Me_You_Us's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Me_You_Us's badges

Me_You_Us's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up from a nightmare that I've been having for a couple of weeks. In the nightmare I'm shot four times in the back by none other than my mother. I'm getting worried. FML

#20575675
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30126) - you deserved it (2942)

On 04/05/2013 at 1:28am - misc - by slightlyworried (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my twelve year-old son thought it would be a good idea to relentlessly shoot the mail truck with a paintball gun in front of all the neighbors. FML

Today, I had to give a 15-minute presentation for a conference. I hadn't had the time to write out a proper speech so I decided to just wing it. My sponsor liked my presentation so much he wants me to turn it into an article. Now if only I could remember what I said. FML

#20575166
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34161) - you deserved it (11046)

On 04/04/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by BrillianceSucks (woman) - Canada

Today, while shopping for a birthday present for my size 0 friend, I picked out a pair of pants for her. When paying, the cashier looked me up and down and said, "Well, you're pretty optimistic aren't you?" FML

#20574572
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46200) - you deserved it (3839)

On 04/04/2013 at 11:12am - misc - by NotASize0 (woman) - Denmark

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

#20561915
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37438) - you deserved it (17433)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:04am - health - by first time at McDonald's in months... - United States

Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML

#20561241
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27352) - you deserved it (3093)

On 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm - animals - by whykarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

#20561180
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37873) - you deserved it (4628)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47437) - you deserved it (3172)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

#20553373
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46433) - you deserved it (6014)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41788) - you deserved it (15696)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I'm 5 months pregnant. My 20-year-old boyfriend still refuses to tell his parents because he thinks he'll get in trouble. He thinks we can get away with "never telling them and just hiding the kid." FML

#20536957
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38098) - you deserved it (9202)

On 03/09/2013 at 12:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Pakistan

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37227) - you deserved it (2856)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

#20536189
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26882) - you deserved it (3549)

On 03/08/2013 at 7:38pm - misc - by fuck you, gran (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

#20506765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34666) - you deserved it (2166)

On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: