McA513M

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McA513M

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 May 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 35812
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About McA513M : If you're bored like me, then message me at: mca513m@me.com . Weirdos are appreciated! :)

McA513M's page activity

Visits<b>Howardthegoose</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 9:47am<b>m1e0l</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 5:24pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:19am<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 11:39am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:23am<b>WubStep_</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:39pm<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 12:51pm<b>TubbyMunsler</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 11:24pm<b>nic_football</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 3:02am<b>Shootermtd25</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 7:57pm<b>Sydd1799</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:10am<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 7:16am<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 1:39pm<b>Brycecake</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 10:55am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:33pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 6:27am<b>sw2f2fchik612</b> - the 04/20/2010 at 11:47pm<b>KoiTeeth</b> - the 04/11/2010 at 7:25pm

McA513M's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

McA513M's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up finding myself violently humping my pillow. My mom recorded it. FML

by R_U_CEREAL / 07/04/2009 at 4:58am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I wrote a long wall post on my teachers wall on facebook including how much of a douche I thought she was, I wasn't planning on posting it but did on accident, so I quickly deleted it. I felt pretty clever. Did you know facebook sends you emails including what was written on the post? FML

by Sallyfromtheseashore / 07/01/2009 at 6:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

by Asterisk1009 / 06/29/2009 at 1:41am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML

by Victim / 06/27/2009 at 9:47am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2009 at 4:20am / Japan / Transportation

Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML

by EmployeeOfTheMonth / 06/27/2009 at 3:03am / United States (California) / Work

Today, our favorite teacher walked into our history class and everyone started whistling, I decided to join in by screaming 'sexy'. The room went quiet and all heads turned to me. FML

by mtorres8789 / 06/27/2009 at 2:33am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

by notinflammable / 06/27/2009 at 12:41am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. My doctor said it was okay to eat, so, I had some mashed potatoes. Apparently, my body disagreed with the doctor, because I threw up. Because my face was so swollen, it didn't make it out my mouth. It went through my nose instead. I literally blew chunks. FML

by bloodynose / 06/26/2009 at 10:35pm / United States (New York) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 9:00pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

by Emptyspace / 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking by a bunch of pretty girls. I'm not the most attractive boy, so I walked by nervously. I heard one yell "Hey cutie!" I turned to look, and they started laughing. She said "Oh my god, sorry! I assumed you were cute from your butt!" Apparently, my ass is nicer than my face. FML

by bitches. / 06/14/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was alone in my friend's kitchen. I had "Don't Cha" stuck in my head all day so I decided to let it out by doing a slutty dance, including spinning around the support pole in the kitchen. I heard a noise outside and saw my friend's dad had been cleaning the windows. With a boner. FML

by sluttydancer / 06/10/2009 at 9:51am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy