Marissa1586

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Offline (the 01/04/2014 at 5:06am)

Marissa1586

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 May 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4124
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Marissa1586's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 6:43pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 6:49am<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 1:30am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 2:49pm<b>Arni792</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 1:40pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 3:31am<b>Bambibot</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 3:30pm<b>rob02</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 6:31am<b>Roulios</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 4:48pm<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 6:58pm<b>anne90210</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 2:31am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 11:12pm<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 11/25/2012 at 1:31am<b>loyeah</b> - the 07/13/2012 at 10:43pm<b>MiSsNiKiTa</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 12:47am<b>paco1021</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 12:53am

Marissa1586's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Marissa1586's badges

Marissa1586's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm / United States / Love

Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML

by santashelper / 12/05/2011 at 6:32pm / United States / Kids

Today, my parents bought purity rings for my twin brother and me for our birthday, and had them blessed by our priest. Neither of us are virgins. FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 12:23am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I almost got a blowjob for the first time. Except I came before I even got in her mouth. FML

by Rumpkis / 12/04/2011 at 8:30pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

by brittrod / 12/04/2011 at 8:13pm / United States / Love

Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML

by wowthatwould / 12/04/2011 at 4:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, the girl I've had a crush on for years asked if I could be her "emergency gay friend". Worst part? I said yes. FML

by lifesucksbigtimefuys / 12/04/2011 at 3:36am / United Kingdom (Devon) / Love

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2011 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

by perenoel / 12/03/2011 at 11:24am / France / Kids

Today, my mom, who is relatively new to Facebook, posted on her friend's wall, telling her about her recent diagnosis of vaginal thrush. She assumed that her wall post was private. Six of my friends liked the post. FML

by djkimmaz / 12/03/2011 at 6:23am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy

Today, after telling my boyfriend I was willing to try just about anything to revive our sex life, he confessed to having a swirly fetish. FML

by Jess49 / 12/02/2011 at 9:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2011 at 9:02pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my boss announced that instead of holiday bonuses being on the cards, the company is going under and we'll all be out of a job next year. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States / Work

Today, my mom bought me pepper spray in case anyone tried to "mess" with me. I put it in my purse. Later, a guy snatched my purse before I even had the chance to take out the pepper spray. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2011 at 12:06pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous