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Marissa1586's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Marissa1586's favorite FMLs
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
by :( / 06/24/2012 at 5:45pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 10:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, it was my boyfriend's grandfather's funeral and visitation. These things make me nervous, and not thinking, I made comments that included the words "killing", "dying", and "death". I'm a rubbish support system. FML
by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 7:38am / Italy / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/24/2012 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML
by Melinie / 06/23/2012 at 11:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after having been constipated for ages, I finally forced out a week's worth of build-up. The excruciating pain reduced me to tears, and my boyfriend refused to drive me to the hospital, because according to him, I must have had anal sex with someone. FML
by Anonymous / 06/21/2012 at 1:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Bad Mommy / 06/21/2012 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Kids
by notanidiot / 06/20/2012 at 8:46am / United States (Michigan) / Work
by meeks123 / 06/20/2012 at 1:03am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by jnr1234 / 06/19/2012 at 10:15pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
Today, I had an hour long meeting with my manager where she informed me the reason I had not been promoted is because she felt that people would not like to work for me, because I would, "make them do their job." FML
by Anonymous / 06/19/2012 at 3:00am / United States / Work
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
by DwarfFrog / 06/18/2012 at 7:38am / United States / Miscellaneous
by a chick in California / 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Steve / 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
by Rosie / 06/13/2012 at 12:07pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish…