Marissa1586

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Offline (the 01/04/2014 at 5:06am)

Marissa1586

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 May 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4889
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Marissa1586's page activity

Visits<b>Artures_way1</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 9:40pm<b>MBielefeld</b> - the 08/27/2016 at 1:15pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:43pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 6:49am<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 1:30am<b>Arni792</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 1:40pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 3:31am<b>Bambibot</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 3:30pm<b>rob02</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 6:31am<b>Roulios</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 4:48pm<b>anne90210</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 2:31am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 11:12pm<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 11/25/2012 at 1:31am<b>loyeah</b> - the 07/13/2012 at 10:43pm<b>MiSsNiKiTa</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 12:47am<b>paco1021</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 12:53am

Marissa1586's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Marissa1586's badges

Marissa1586's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I agreed that he would name our first born and I would name our second. He's dead-set on naming our child "Raindropp" no matter whether it's a boy or girl. FML

by trisha / 07/16/2012 at 4:57pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm / Nigeria (Lagos) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

by totallyembarassed / 07/07/2012 at 12:08am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

by ambushcat / 07/05/2012 at 11:31pm / United States / Animals

Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML

by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a four-year-old girl, when I came across a toy that sang the Macarena. For fun, I decided to teach her the dance. When she showed her parents, instead of putting her hands on her backside and turning, she decided to bend over and moon them. FML

by fired / 06/27/2012 at 4:48pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I had an IUD put in two years ago that's supposed to prevent pregnancy. To put it in perspective, less than 1% of people using this IUD get pregnant. Lucky me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2012 at 4:02pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my grandmother said she's noticed that I've been very angry lately. She came to the conclusion that I "haven't been laid enough" and my boyfriend is "not doing his job." Thanks Grandma. FML

by RatCityChick / 06/27/2012 at 1:18pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML

by NoMagicMike / 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I tried for 45 minutes to convince my psychiatrist to take me off my antidepressant. When he finally agreed to do so, I broke down into tears and sobbed uncontrollably for 10 minutes. Hello, increased prescription. FML

by purpleskylight / 06/27/2012 at 1:29am / United States (Kentucky) / Health

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

by tammy / 06/27/2012 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML

by deli Shoppe / 06/27/2012 at 12:39am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter tried to sneak out of the house. When I caught her, she freaked out and punched me in the face. She then "snapped out of it" and claimed she was sleepwalking. FML

by abbielane / 06/25/2012 at 12:08am / United States (Michigan) / Kids