Mama_Umbridge

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Mama_Umbridge

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 31 July 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1511
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Mama_Umbridge : Its me, yer mama!!!

I am woman! Hear me SMASH!!!!

Mama_Umbridge's page activity

Visits<b>DatBlueDerp</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 11:08pm<b>bearbear120</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 2:17am<b>shaobi</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 12:18pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 5:38am<b>Ins3rtEpicName</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 4:32am<b>seninaa</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 4:06pm<b>moneymuffen</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:42am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:19pm<b>bethyc4</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 1:32pm<b>Jace_Crockett</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 12:50pm<b>_awwhellnaw_</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 5:02am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 3:03am<b>penguinhalo</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 7:30pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 7:58pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 8:50pm<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 8:25pm<b>quinny_1024</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 8:00pm<b>winter_under_ice</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:31pm

Fucked!<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 11:19pm

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Mama_Umbridge's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I exchanged pictures with a guy I met online, whose devotion to his family really impressed me. In his picture, he was wearing clown makeup, holding a huge knife to his throat with one hand, and an ICP album in the other. All this with a psychopathic grin on his face. FML

by probablydeadbymidnight / 07/01/2012 at 6:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a really bad sunburn. On my eyelids. Who knew blinking could be so painful? FML

by donnap / 06/09/2012 at 1:54am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was in a business meeting. I was giving a Powerpoint presentation to my boss and a few other associates. Then a notification popped up in the middle of my presentation reminding me that I needed to renew my pornhub subscription. FML

by WaffleMan / 06/08/2012 at 7:58am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I found out I have an incredible fear of butterflies. I discovered this after my mother took me to a butterfly sanctuary for some "mother-daughter bonding time." FML

by anonymous / 06/07/2012 at 7:00am / United States / Animals

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML

by anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML

by Avery / 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert". Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2010 at 4:12pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love