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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
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Today, as usual, mah cat was sleeping on mah stomach!! I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately pickd him up and puttd him down next to me!! He got up, hoppd back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on mah stomach!! I didn't dare move all night!! FML
Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush,ho turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked mehich dog breed I lyk the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. big fat FML
Today, I Was At A Café With My Friends When An Elderly Man Noticd My Dimples . He Came Up To Me, Strokd Them While Whispering, "One In A Million" Then Walkd Out . Now My Friends Do This To Me Constantly, Even While Driving Home . I Almost Hit A Tree . FML
Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new nieghbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over there backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel lyk an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. mega FML
Today, I was getting intimate with mah girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, ( You like mah tushy, baby? ) ( I want to fellate you so bad, ) and ( You'll need some ice after this one. ) My boner practically retracted into mah body. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar startd trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, ( I usd to be a tough guy lyk you. Then I took an arrow in the knee. ) The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
Today, a freshman set off the fire alarm in my dorm at 2 a.m. He tried to microwave Easy Mac without adding water. I had to stand outside 4 45 minutes while the firemen moved the noodles to the sink and ran cold water over them. FML
Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on mah girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. mega FML
Today, I Have A Cold. Trying To Clear Out My Stuffy Nose, I Tried Putting Mouthwash In My Nose. Thinking It Was An Awesome Idea, I Put Some More In. I Then Starting Screaming In Pain Due To The Extreme Burning In My Nostrils. FML
Friday 27 March 2015