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Mailman2121

Offline (the 08/13/2014 at 11:34pm) | Search for a member

Mailman2121

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  • Number of visits : 169
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Mailman2121's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 4:56pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 6:25am<b>meli1195</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 2:15am<b>stryggzy</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Jazzy9999</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 12:55pm<b>laden_swallow09</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 10:18am<b>TheCrispyCat</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 4:23pm<b>brwneyes</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 6:41pm

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Mailman2121's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48704) - you deserved it (6438)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46766) - you deserved it (13179)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57677) - you deserved it (6814)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39076) - you deserved it (10322)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

#20507681
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39759) - you deserved it (3884)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:07am - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went up to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML

#20065827
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18271) - you deserved it (1791)

On 09/10/2012 at 2:06am - misc - by NotJessePinkmanFFS (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML

#18408881
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21811) - you deserved it (5559)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by inpain - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30926) - you deserved it (2970)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML

#10777630
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10396) - you deserved it (36702)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:35pm - misc - by noraidk - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29958) - you deserved it (74681)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. I was playing with his little sister by grabbing her arms and spinning her around. On one turn, she started screaming in pain. It turns out I dislocated both her shoulders. FML

#956665
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (63328)

On 04/13/2009 at 7:27pm - kids - by grem (woman) - United States



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