Mahtari

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Mahtari

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 February 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12883
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mahtari : I shitpost and pretend to be Japanese.

Mahtari's page activity

Visits<b>TheEpicWario</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:45pm<b>Mons</b> - the 10/05/2016 at 8:35am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 8:48pm<b>smw83</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 5:22pm<b>xxgood_vibesxx</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 1:23am<b>kingofthelawyers</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 12:02pm<b>wreckdit</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 4:53pm<b>strangegirl505</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 4:15am<b>cornyrob</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 6:31am<b>KitsuneDuo</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 1:36pm<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 11:19am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 9:47am<b>kaz55</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 8:19am<b>kfchicken</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:53am<b>ericanicole1</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 11:42pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:34pm<b>wallac7</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 8:35am<b>Flyndaran</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 6:37pm

Fucked!<b>marcus_1028</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 2:39pm<b>pippa247</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:19pm

Mahtari's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Mahtari's badges

Mahtari's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

by Brasilian29 / 12/11/2014 at 7:01am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

by terdberglerforlyfe / 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Kids

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2014 at 7:43pm / United States / Work

Today, my neighbor's five-year-old rode his tricycle into a history diorama I had spent days slaving over. When I confronted him, he just said, "Vroom vroom muthafucka." FML

by hellalegit / 11/07/2014 at 1:26am / United States (California) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

by Anonymous / 10/31/2014 at 6:55am / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Kids

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

by lady parts / 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

by subduedbeast / 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

by MySonThePoet / 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, there was a laundry basket of my clothes sitting in my room. My dad asked me if they were clean or not. When I said I didn't know, he picked up a piece of my clothing, sniffed it, and said it smelled fine. That piece of clothing just so happened to be my underwear. FML

by socreepedouticanteven / 10/26/2014 at 8:05pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

by mellielynnemily / 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm / United States / Love

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to download some network-monitoring software for the office as I suspect that one of my staff has been constantly downloading torrents. It wouldn't download because someone was using all the bandwidth. FML

by Thewatcher / 10/22/2014 at 4:09am / Mauritius / Work

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

by Deadpool434 / 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous